(AP Photo)
Monday, February 27, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Quickie: I Think Callista Is Getting Pretty Sick Of Hearing That Stump Speech
Callista Gingrich, wife of Republican presidential candidate and former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, listens to husband speak at a town hall meeting with the state's Asian Republican leaders during the California Republican Party spring convention Saturday, Feb. 25, 2012 in Burlingame, Calif. (AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez)
Also: not a good hair day.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Callista Unleashes The FURRY On Innocent Arizona Tots
Callista Gingrich, wife of Republican presidential candidate, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, walks with Ellis the Elephant, a character from her childrens book, during a visit to Chaparral Elementary School on Wednesday, Feb. 22, 2012 in Gilbert, Ariz. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)
This is just such a weird choice. Obviously Goddess Callista and Newt had to go to Arizona, and obviously The Queen needed to have something to do (after all, it's not like the Tiffany's in Scottsdale has a different selection from any other Tiffany's), so they apparently drew a random location from a hat and off she went to... Gilbert? Yes, Gilbert, probably the WASPiest/Catholiciest, whitest and least Mormon part of the Phoenix metropolitan area. OK, never mind, that isn't a weird choice. I guess it makes sense after all.
Moving on! OMG, it's that Ellis the Elephant furry again, the one we all hate with its cloven hooves and disquieting tiger-striped trunk. Ugh. And I'm sure you all will have something to say about that pantsuit, almost certainly a St. John's creation intended more for, you know, an elderly East Coast museum docent (don't be fooled by that Neiman Marcus model). Callista even appears to be hunching around like an old lady. Stop it! Callista, everybody knows you're twenty years younger than your husband! This is just ridiculous.
And then after all that, the deformed elephant that walks like a
But let's get back on topic. Her hair looked great! Here's another shot:
And you know what? I think it's coming back to me: didn't a lot of newscaster ladies have that hairdo in the late 1980s and into the 90s? Didn't Bree Walker have a bubblehead at one point? (ANSWER: Sort of. Not really. Sorry, where was I?). There really should be a comprehensive database of newscaster hairdos available for such important research. Tsk.
I'll leave you tonight with a gorgeous close-up from the photo above:
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Jennifer Rubin Is All Out Of Love With Rick Santorum
Oooooh, maybe soon I'll have Sparklecrush Jen Rubin all to myself as she rejects yet another boyfriend. This time she's all, like, OMG Rick Santorum is kinda crazy! She's just now figuring this out! She used to be one of his most dependable cheerleaders, and now she's... so not.
In fact, she's now doing her trademarked bash-a-thon against Rick, just as she did previously against Newt and Herman Cain and Rick Perry. Here are some recent posts:
- Women –Republican women!– hate Santorum. "It is surprising he isn't doing even worse among women voters," says Jen.
- Romney: so much better than Obama or Santorum.
- Santorum: so much worse than Romney in regard to being a preachy whiner.
- Santorum: so much worse than Romney on economic prudence.
- Jen is startled by "revelation" of public Santorum quote from three years ago.
- Jen's friends at Neocon Central (Commentary) hate Rick and so now does Jen!
- Rick Santorum is a reactionary rather than a conservative, says reactionary conservative Jen Rubin. Technically this is absolutely true, but consider the source.
So anyway, you get the picture. And this is Jen, who just a few months ago was big-upping Rick as often as possible! Then she kind of changed tone, voicing her distress with his constantly sex-obsessive nutty talk, but she adopted a "wait 'n' see" tone that suggested that Santorum is just an enthusiastic newcomer, rough around the edges, inexperienced at all this "running for office" stuff, and that he'd calm down and get better. Jennifer! The man has been a full-time politician for decades! He isn't going to get any "better."
This last point is funny stuff, and I recommend that you go hunting for it, because a lot of Santorum apologists are trying out this "he's just new and overexcited" argument. Look here, it's Bill O'Reilly doing it:
Look, Santorum is a guy is who is inexperienced in this arena. He got drawn into a few things. He’s made some past comments. Everybody has dopey past comments… so we have to cut him a little slack…
LOLZ! He was in the House of Representatives for two terms, and in the Senate for over a decade... that doesn't sound like a person "inexperienced in this arena."
The other funny thing is that Rubin acts like Santorum just suddenly and uncharacteristically started saying crazy things, and that this comes as a surprise to her. Bullshit. Jennifer, you knew full well Santorum was way out there, but since he toed the Neocon line, you were willing to overlook his religious zaniness until it got too embarrassing, so don't act all startled, like his nuttiness is a "revelation." I'm guessing that most of the people reading this blog right now haven't been surprised by anything he's said recently, am I right? (UPDATE: I really like Jim Newell, back at Wonkette, on this topic: "We now have to consider the possibility: Could it be that Rick Santorum is something of a religious nut?")
But anyway, Jennifer Rubin has officially broken up with Rick Santorum and now hates, hates, hates him. Romance is dead.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Reprint: Interview With Diane Noomin, 1995
Diane Noomin's comics cover quite a bit of territory, from the broad (ha, ha) farce of her Didi Glitz stories to penetrating social satire and revealing autobiography. At her best, such as in her harrowing story of multiple miscarriages discussed below, she manages to combine all of the above approaches to devastating effect. This story alone makes this collection worth reading.
I interviewed Ms. Noomin for Hypno Magazine in 1995 via telephone, and later met her in person at the San Diego Comic Con. She had just finished editing a new series of Twisted Sisters comics, her influential anthology of female cartoonists, and was finalizing the collected volume, Twisted Sisters 2: Drawing the Line, so she was busy indeed. Later, the magazine came out and the interview was so obnoxiously designed (a Hypno trademark) it looked like a computer had had a nervous breakdown, so I'm re-typing it here rather than subjecting you to ugly scans. The interview follows:
PH: You just finished both editing and contributing to the new Twisted Sisters anthology for Kitchen Sink Press. Was that a tough juggling act?
DIANE NOOMIN: Yes, it was really tough. It's really hard to be an editor of your peers and a cartoonist at the same time. I had to wear a lot of different hats. It was hard, especially, since the first Twisted Sisters was work that had already been in print, so it was just a question of finding stuff I liked and getting permission to use it. There was a lot of work involved, but I didn't have to worry about hassling people about deadlines, or someone deciding that they wanted to do twelve pages instead of ten, or someone deciding to do only three pages when they had promised ten. There were more immediate and pressing problems... dealing with people's personal lives and trying to be sympathetic. I think I was somewhere between a den mother and a drill sergeant.
PH: Mary Fleener affectionately referred to you as an "editress," but also as a Jewish Earth Mother.
DN: [laughs] I don't know if that's about my hips, or what! I guess I'll take it as a compliment.
PH: Your new long story, "Baby Talk", is an excruciatingly personal tale of multiple miscarriages. Was it a cathartic experience to write it?
DN: At times it was. I may not know for a while, because I just finished it, and I'm still pretty close to it. I think that one of the reasons I did it was that I was hoping it would be a cathartic experience. It's interesting, because you find yourself choking up and getting really emotional about something, and then the artist part of you jumps in and says, "Great! I can use that!" There are a lot of powerful emotions involved, but you have to figure out how to not just vomit it out on the page, but turn it into something that people will respond to and want to read.
PH: Was it difficult to inject humor into that story?
DN: Surprisingly, it wasn't that difficult. I was worried about that. I really don't want to do something that people would think, oh, this is a whining story, and who cares, and it's just another story about women's bodily functions. I was really concerned about that. The humor came in when I decided to use Didi Glitz, with these intervals of me and Didi talking. That was a natural source of humor, and that was really fun for me and sort of a needed break.
PH: In the story, you begin with a fictional couple, and then Didi Glitz gets fed-up and literally pulls you from behind that mask and forces you to tell your own story, honestly, without fictionalizing it. Was that planned originally?
DN: [laughs] It wasn't planned. Actually, the story behind "Baby Talk" is that I tried to do that story off and on for a long time, and I think I had the first page-and-one-half for about five years, and I couldn't do it. I just couldn't face it. I wasn't really ready to do the story and deal with the subject of miscarriages. In fact, the subtitle of the story is "A Tale of [3 crossed out] 4 Miscarriages".
PH: Because in the meantime, since starting the story, you had...
DN: Another miscarriage. Finally, I knew it was what I wanted to do for the new Twisted Sisters, but I didn't want to do it the same way. I first wanted to do it indirectly, hiding behind Didi's sister as my fictional stand-in. I didn't want to do it that way anymore, but I didn't want to scrap the work I'd already done! [laughs] I did have some doubts and fears about coming out from behind the mask as well, so I incorporated that, too.
PH: It certainly makes the story more complex, narratively, than your earlier work.
DN: Well, it's fun. It's fun to play with that, the whole notion of being a cartoonist and "how real is your cartoon character?"
PH: It's amazing that you're telling this horrifying tale to Didi Glitz while doing her hair and painting her toenails!
DN: Well, that's what I meant by breaking it up!
PH: It does, but it doesn't take away from the immediacy of the story, which is tremendously affecting.
DN: I'm glad. It was a very tricky juggling act to deal with something so personal and horrific, and turn it into something that people will want to read.
PH: Let's talk more about Didi Glitz. She's been around for roughly twenty years now. Can you tell me something about her origin?
DN: It's sort of complicated. The first Didi story appeared in Wimmen's Comix [Last Gasp, 1974], and it was "She Turned to Crime," where Didi robs a bank and goes to Rio. [laughs] I think she started out as a Halloween costume. I had this bubble wig and leopard skin outfit. I had a roommate at the time, Willie Murphy, a cartoonist, who called me Didi. It's really based on living in Brooklyn in the early 60s.
PH: Is Didi Glitz an alter-ego, or more of a foil to your personality?
DN: That's sort of complicated. She's an alter-ego in that she's very brash, and there's certainly a part of me that would have liked to stay in Brooklyn and eat bagels for the rest of my life. Didi is definitely very real, and a part of me, but she's also a way to create satire and comment on certain types of people, and women's roles and all that stuff.
PH: Is that Nancy's bow on Didi's head?
DN: I never thought of that! [laughs] It looks like it could be. It's rigid enough.
PH: What's in a Golden Cadillac, Didi's favorite drink? Do you like them?
DN: It's Galliano, Triple Sec, and cream. Not bad as far as festive beverages go.
PH: How about Mai Tais? Didi guzzles plenty of those, too.
DN: Mai Tais are good. I like large drinks in coconut shells with umbrellas and pineapple. I go for trimmings.
PH: How have you and your husband influenced each other? I noticed your swipe from his Zippy book Are We Having Fun Yet [Dutton, 1985] in your "I Had to Advertise for Love." [Young Lust, 1990]
DN: He did that earlier?
PH: Yes, the exact same pose (see below, Noomin on the left, Griffith on the right):
DN: Hmmm. I'll have to look it up.
PH: It wasn't intentional?
DN: No... that must be a subconscious influence.
PH: Well then, I guess that's a good example of how you influence each other!*
DN: Also, when we started going out, Bill was already an established cartoonist, and he took it real seriously, and he was at the drawing board being a complete workaholic, so just having someone around who was drawing all the time was a big influence on me getting serious about it.
PH: Bill drew himself in "Baby Talk", and Didi made guest appearances in Zippy. Are you two planning on any further collaborations?
DN: We're not really planning anything. I guess sometimes it just happens. I asked him to do that in "Baby Talk". It just seemed like the right approach, because it was such a personal story, and it was his story as well. I did tell him what to draw and what to say! [laughs]
DN: But in terms of influencing him, I'll just say what I think, and if he wants to... Neither one of us are super great at taking criticism. You sort of pout for a while, and think about what they said, and end up changing it. We worked on the screenplay together for the Zippy movie.
PH: Ah, yes, the Zippy movie...
DN: On that level, I got very involved with his work. I was writing the screenplay with him, and it was his characters, so that was very interesting. It's gone off and on for, I don't know, nine years or something.
PH: Do you think it will ever get made?
DN: I have no idea. It's possible. We've had many entertaining Hollywood meetings. At this point, I'm very skeptical.
PH: Is Didi Glitz in the screenplay?
DN: No, I wouldn't want to do that. I wouldn't want to throw it away. I have plans for her.
PH: Would you ever attempt to do a daily strip?
DN: I actually tried that for about a week-and-a-half, and I thought I'd have a nervous breakdown. It's very difficult. Just sitting there and having that pressure. It's kinda like writing a Zen haiku each time.
PH: At least it should be, unlike most daily strips.
DN: Unlike Marmaduke! [laughs]
PH: You mentioned earlier an affection for Family Circus.
DN: Well, it's grown on me. It's very surreal. Bill showed me a recent one where one of the kids was imagining himself as an old man, and he had a beard, but he still looked exactly the same!
PH: Your work, on the other hand, is often very sexually graphic. Any comments?
DN: It's kind of liberating the first time you do that; you sort of shock yourself, and then it's kinda fun.
PH: You get pretty extreme, what with Didi and her poodle!
DN: That's part of the fun, to take it as far as you can. When you think about Didi, and you think about poodles, it's not all that unlikely.
PH: Do you consider yourself a feminist?
DN: I consider myself a feminist. Certainly there are people who won't, but I'm a feminist and I think it's good to do sexual material, and make fun of sex, and not think that there are certain bodily functions that we shouldn't talk about because we're feminists. I think that's... fucked up. I believe in the First Amendment extremely, and there are lots of things in print that I don't like, and I think are horrible... but there are a lot of people who don't like my work, and don't want to see it in print.
PH: Did you get any flack for "Lesbo a Go Go", in which Didi is seduced by a lesbian, and it all turns out to be a cruel trick?
DN: No. [laughs] I didn't. I've had people ask, "How come there are no lesbians in Twisted Sisters?" and my first reaction is, well, how do you know there aren't? My second reaction is that I don't care who you fuck, I just care about how you draw!
Disclosures: Oh, hey, look at that! I'm surprised to see that my introduction to the original Hypno article, not included here, is quoted on the back of the new book, and credited to the magazine rather than to me, which is kind of funny because who remembers Hypno? Also, in the "WTF kind of small world do we inhabit" department, Diane's first husband is my current boss at the National Gallery of Art.
*Actually, looking at this years later, I'm positive they were probably both "swiping" from the same source. Also:
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Uppity Shopgirls Say Mean Things About Callista
Oh! You will be incensed! Neiman Marcus is supposed to be discreet:
The sales clerks behind the jewelry counter at the Neiman Marcus here didn't watch Callista Gingrich's Friday speech at CPAC — but they could guess exactly what outfit she'd picked for the occasion.
"Was she wearing a red St. John's?" [yes] asked one eye-rolling employee, prompting a nearby co-worker to snicker and nod in agreement.
Can you believe it? A reporter from Buzzfeed, of all places, spoke to "five different employees" at Neiman's Tyson's Corner store! Heads will ROLL, Pony Pals, trust me.
We do find out that our favorite Queen of the Moon has a penchant for St. John's Knits. Heck, I could have told you that.
And finally, some advice from an insolent clerk:
"Somebody just needs to shake her up, put a comb through that hair, and take a cloth to her face" to remove her makeup, he said.
Still, for all his complaints, he said he hoped Gingrich wins the presidency: "Then I'd have access to the White House," he said.
Ha ha, not now!
And, of course, they gossip about Callista dressing older than her years, totally missing the point that this is intentional.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Rick Santorum Hand Turkeys!
Republican presidential candidate, former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum, is silhouetted against a window as he speaks at a rally, Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2012, in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren)
Quotes from Santorum's speech in North Dakota, Wednesday.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Quickie Reminder: The Person Seen In The CNN Screenshot Below Is, In Fact, Two Totally Different People. You Can Tell Them Apart By The Color Of Their Ties.
Oh! And OMG one of them isn't wearing a flag pin. Blasphemer!
Digital Graveyard: Mean Church Spot Illustration
Last time in the Digital Graveyard, I dug up the preliminary drawings for my Negativland/Chumbawamba CD cover. This time it's just a cute/mean church I did as a little spot illustration for a local San Diego punk magazine in about 1995. I still like it!
Gingrich Meets With Condi. This Can Only Mean OMG Condi Veep Rumors!!!
Funny thing is, I'm sure that's exactly why Gingrich met with her, to either ask her to be his running mate (ew), or to at least fuel some Condi Veep Rumor™ speculation. The latter will certainly happen. Count on it!
It's been weeks since we've had some hot, fresh, totally unfounded Condi Veep Rumors™, so this is good.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Callistaproduct Abhors A Vacuum
That didn't stop Amy Gardner at the Washington Post, however, from producing a wonderfully unnecessary story about our favorite Moon Vixen to fill today's gap in Callistaproduct. It turns out that Callista is ever-so-timidly stepping into the spotlight, but mainly is quiet and not very interesting. So there! Now you know! We just keep learning new and surprising things about Callista, every day.
This concludes today's utterly pointless Callista Roundup!
UPDATE!! It turns out there is a fab new Callistapic today after all, and it's a doozy (and you can click to worship it supersized!):
Callista Gingrich, wife of Republican presidential candidate, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich meets with Republican supporters at a Smashburger restaurant, Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2012, in San Diego. (AP Photo/Gregory Bull)
BEST CALLISTA HAIRDO PIC EVER!!!
UPDATE AGAIN! As if to demonstrate that no news is good news, Politico hops onto the Callista non-news bandwagon with a NEW non-news story about how Callista is ever-so-timidly stepping into the spotlight, but mainly is quiet and not very interesting. The more you know!
Here's Your Valentine's Day Gross-Out
Ew, ew, ew! Politico reports:
At a campaign event in South El Monte, Calif., on Monday, Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich was asked by an audience member about his Valentine's Day plans with wife, Callista.
He opted to leave a little to the imagination.
"All I can promise is that I believe she will be quite happy tomorrow night," Gingrich said. "I think for the first time in a while we have a private dinner and hopefully [can] exchange gifts, and reconnect a little bit."
He paused as the crowd chuckled.
"No more details," Gingrich said, getting cheers from the room
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Chicks Dig Newt
Callista Gingrich watches as her husband, Republican presidential candidate, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich speaks at the Conservative Political Action Conference on Friday, Feb. 10, 2012 in Washington. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)
I lamented just the other day that what Goddess Callista really needs is better writers. I've got good news and good/bad news on that front. First, the wonderful/terrible news is that whoever wrote Callista's introduction to Hubby at CPAC is a hack of the worst sort. Did you watch this awkward thing? The golf jokes were so bad. Did Callie write this stuff herself? Her delivery was also unimpressive, stilted and robotic, so that was excellent. If this is the campaign's idea of "unleashing Callista," then I'm looking forward to more cringe-inducing greatness.
Now as far as people writing about the Mistress of the Platinum Space Helmet rather than for her, things are improving. Several mainstream journalists have attempted and failed to address the magic and wonder of the spherical coiffure, but I really enjoyed Elissa Gootman's meditation/investigation in the New York Times. This is finally a top-notch report on this crucially important subject, and you will love it. Best sentence ever:
Yes, there are pressing issues facing the nation, from unemployment to foreclosures. But there is still room, it seems, to contemplate the fixed pale-blonde halo framing the delicate head of Newt Gingrich’s wife.
Hear hear! Or, rather, here here!
Bookshelf: Macrocephalic Off-Model Nancy Paper Doll, Whitman Publishing, 1971
Click all for bigger.
This cheap, poorly drawn paper doll book measures about 15.5" x 7.25", so it's pretty big, all the better to frighten you with a totally psychotic looking Nancy, her giant head looming, ready to crush you. Oh, what a travesty.
I'd like to say that Ernie Bushmiller had nothing to do whatsoever with this awful publication, but Pony Pal™ Mark confirmed that he saw a copy of it in Bushmiller's studio after he died, so even if he obviously didn't draw it himself, he at least signed off on it. Tsk. And this was in 1971, when he was still making great, great strips!
So it's with great sorrow that I present the terrible outfits designed to bring Nancy "up to date" to the swinging early 1970s. First, below on the right is Nancy's "classic" outfit, but it quickly goes off the rails thereafter:
The incidental drawings are beyond bad. Next, below left, I guess they're trying to borrow a little mojo from hot newcomer Holly Hobbie and the top left outfit almost seems to anticipate Strawberry Shortcake:
Yeah, well, you look funny, too, Nancy. Below, garish fun in the sun or snow, as well as a psychedelic version of her regular outfit:
There wasn't a ton of licensed Nancy and Sluggo merchandise, and most of it is pretty bad. What's especially sad about this one is that Bushmiller was so good at depicting fashions and costumes, really one of the best ever in the history of comics, and it would have been possible to cobble together an amazing paper doll set using original Bushmiller drawings.
Poor Nancy, all dressed up and no place to go without being mortally embarrassed.
UPDATE:
No.
Thursday, February 09, 2012
And The National Enquirer's Big "Callista Gingrich Lesbian Shocker" Is...
Tuesday, February 07, 2012
French Television Rides The Pink Pony And The Callista Express, Maureen Dowd does not.
Republican presidential candidate, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, accompanied by his wife Callista, speaks at the Price Hill Chili Restaurant in Cincinnati, Ohio, Tuesday, Feb. 7, 2012. (All photos AP Photo/Evan Vucci)
OK, so, yeah, Maureen Dowd wrote something about Goddess Callista and it was limp, obvious stuff: Callista is "wifey," a throwback, etc. Yes, we know that. I'm not unsympathetic, because it is frustrating for a writer to be faced with such a subject: so alluring, and yet so devoid of content. But good writers have been making alluring yet empty things both fascinating and entertaining for centuries, so you'd think, my goodness, that the Callista Express is totally a rocket Maureen Dowd can clamber aboard and ride to the moon, right? But no. And that's because Maureen Dowd is not a good writer.
And neither, for that matter, is Matthew Shelley of CBS News, who offers up a stunningly pointless "analysis" of Callista even more lightweight than Dowd's. It turns out that Callista Gingrich is quiet and doesn't say much. Analysis!
Let's take a break, share a moment of silence, and stare at a picture of Callista:
Ahhhh, that's better. Was that good for you, too? Note that the formidable hair sculpture has recovered nicely from its recent run-in with a cruel, overzealous dye pot wielder. Phew.
But speaking of the hair, wouldn't you like to watch a video of French comedians making fun of the Callie Coiffurechitecture (You guys! I totally just coined that word!!)? It's a little hard to figure out, because as Steve Martin once said, it's like those French have a different word for everything. Here's the New Yorker, thank goodness, with a play-by-play:
Next: “We have an image just of Callista!” She’s in blue. The hair is voluminous. “Good God!” Barthès sputters. He makes some gestures around his head. “But what is this crash helmet?” A moment later, he declares, “We have discovered the secret of this mysterious cut, thanks to Leonardo da Vinci.” Now it’s Caleesta again, with the Vitruvian Man superimposed on her face. Barthès rattles off measurements and radii in a tone of Dan Brown-ish portentousness. We see another image of Callista, on a day with “winds strong enough to tear off a cow’s horn,” standing alongside Newt. “It swells slightly,” Barthès says, “but nothing moves.”
Huh. Analysis with graphical overlays concerning the spherical nature of Callista's Platinum Space Helmet? Pointing out that inferior beings' hairdos are subject to the whim of the winds while Callista's is not? Sounds like somebody's been visiting Princess Sparkle Pony, n'est-ce pas?
And that's OK, because I'm honored to be of service to French comedians. May I be of service to Jean Dujardin next, please?
One more thing: at breakfast this morning, one of my coworkers couched the idea of the hairdo's majestic side tentacle actually being prehensile. Oh wow, my mind was flooded with such visions!
Sometimes Satire Just Writes Itself
(PSP flashback to 07-02-10, AP Photo)
The Indoor Tanning Industry’s political action committee has contributed $5,000 House Speaker John Boehner’s (R-OH) campaign account and another $5,000 to the National Republican Congressional Campaign’s Boehner for Speaker Committee.
$10,000! That must match at least what Boehner spends on tanning per month.
Friday, February 03, 2012
Callista Roundup! Too Much Callista? SHUT UP. You Did NOT Say That
So what are people saying about Queen Hair Sculpture™ these days? Buzzfeed has a hilarious piece about how Gingrich Production's communications directer massaged Callista's Wikipedia page over and over, repeatedly, and then got caught lying about it, and then "made peace" with the Wikipedia editors. I wonder if he's the one who deleted the funny gag about Callie-Lou's "superb skills at oral sex"? This is a fairy tale for the 21st Century. Disney will make this story into an animated feature in 2035.
Turning to a tale quite a bit less suitable for a children's movie is Media Snack's story about reporters from Vice asking the Gingriches if they had an "open marriage," to which Newt said no but Callista, thrillingly, did not.
Speaking of which, sorry, I haven't bought the National Enquirer with the Callista lesbo fantasy yet. That's because I'm scared. Scared that such a great thing couldn't possibly be true. Have you braced yourself for the letdown? Stay tuned!
Next, the Financial Times cruelly uses Callista as an exception to the rule that politicians' wives "humanize" their husbands, stating that her "stand-by-your-man role seems like a throwback." Bitches. They're just jealous.
And finally for today, Callista's charity of the month is the Mount Vernon Ladies' Association, an association of ladies who are rich and attend cocktail parties at George Washington's house. One day, Callista, you will rule them ALL.
Art Collection: "Nancy" Sunday Comic Strip By Ernie Bushmiller, 1967
(Click for lots bigger.)
Like most hardcore Nancy fans, I'm not as impressed by the Sunday pages, but I had to get one, and this is an above-average example. Basically, Bushmiller's weekday strips were masterpieces of minimalist balance and tight gag structure, little vaudevillian Zen koans, so carefully constructed that they are absorbed by the brain before the eyes even have a chance to blink. The Sundays, however, are a little flabby, with too much setup for the final gag. You can see above that the bottom two panels would make a great stand-alone strip*, and everything above is pretty unnecessary (keeping in mind, to be fair, that the top row was designed to be drop-able). Furthermore, Bushmiller relied heavily on his assistants for the Sunday pages, making them even less "pure." Fantagraphics will not be including the Sunday pages in their forthcoming Nancy collections, and while unfortunate, it doesn't bother me all that much. All the same, these individual panels are well composed and the drawings are, of course, excellent. Note, too, that the first panel includes a strange double appearance of the mystical "three rocks."
Just for fun, I decided to clean up the scan and make a color version of the strip. I used only those colors available to newspapers of the period, and referred to Sunday Nancy scans online as a guide. Otherwise, I tried to keep it simple and use Bushmiller's own compositional strategies** to place the colors in a harmonious, rhythmic way:
(Click for bigger)
*In fact, I have in my collection an unfinished drawing by Bushmiller for a weekday strip which was abandoned and then expanded into a Sunday page.
**Bushmiller was apparently not very involved in the coloring of the Sunday pages, and indeed, it's hard to imagine him caring much about anything other than black and white.
UPDATE: I was just thinking of other cartoonists whose work was way, way better on weekdays than on Sundays and vice versa. Better on weekdays: Dick Tracy, Alley Oop, For Better or For Worse, Terry and the Pirates, Dennis the Menace. Better on Sundays: Krazy Kat, Gasoline Alley, Gordo, Bloom County. Equally gifted in different ways at both: Calvin and Hobbes, Peanuts, Captain Easy, Li'l Abner, Mutts, Non Sequitur. Etc.!
UPDATE: To illustrate a point I made in the comments about how this page would likely be reformatted for comic book use:
Wednesday, February 01, 2012
Pardon Me For Just A Moment While I Attempt To Recover From Having My Mind Totally Blown
It's real. I mean, it's a real magazine cover. I'm not sure if I like the idea of this story (which isn't posted online) or not!
Also! Here is a wonderful, wonderful sentence from the Daily Mail:
It seems to me that there's only one answer: unleash Callista.YES. Do it! Do it! Do it! UNLEASH THE CALLISTA!
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