Thursday, March 05, 2009

The Story So Far: Hillary Not as Photo-Oppy as Condi, but I Totally Hate This Coat


Belgium Foreign Minister Karel de Gucht (L) welcomes US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton before a 'transatlantic' dinner at Egmont palace. Clinton said Wednesday that she was very encouraged by the position of European nations on hosting inmates from Guantanamo prison, which Washington has moved to close. (AFP/Dominique Faget)


It's been what, like, a year now that Hillary Clinton has been SoS? OK, so let's evaluate: sifting through news photos of her just is not as much fun as it was with Condi. I mean, tracking the hairdo (so you don't have to) was a nerve-wracking occupation! You never knew when things in Condiland might go fabulously awry. In other words: don't hold your breath for an aglitter piano recital from Hils anytime soon.

I also enjoyed, obviously, the relentless succession and frequency, almost hypnotic, of Condi's incredible, mechanical, pre-tested, pre-programmed and marked-with-tape-on-the-floor photo-ops: the hallowed Matching Armchairs, the Dueling Podiums, the Madison Time. They were such wonderful snowflake-like creations, all alike yet all tantalizingly different and inane in their own unique ways.

Not so Secretary Pantsuit. She hasn't been an enthusiastic participant, so far, in the Matching Armchairs thing; most of the photos show her coming and going from activities rather than in staged "availabilities." She's done a few Madison Times and, naturally, the unavoidable Dueling Podiums, but they just don't have the same zany pizazz so frequently provided by Doctor Ferragamo's intriguing suits and tasteless accessories. The truth of the matter is that Hillary has turned into everything I feared: an uninspired dresser with neither poor nor great taste, a hairdo which fails to speak to me in even the tiniest voice, and an apparent preference to actually work rather than pose at working.

This approach fails to meet the needs of satirical bloggers. Tsk.

But, like I said, God, I just totally hate that coat.

20 comments:

Adam J said...

You can type whatever you want, but all I'm seeing is "best coat EVARRRR."

Anonymous said...

But did you see that fabulously- lined coat she was wearing that first trip? Rachael Maddow couldn't resist commenting on how stylish it was.

Anonymous said...

If she's wearing it over a pair of ripped 501s then I am OK with this coat. Otherwise, gawd!

Mistress Cynica said...

Dear God, that's hideous. And I bet she's wearing it over one of her 400 pairs of black pants, which makes it even worse. The hair makes her head look tiny while the coat makes her look huge. Awful!

Kathy said...

I have a bathrobe that looks JUST LIKE THAT jacket! Got it at TJMaxx. Maybe Hillary shops there, too.

Muscato said...

But Princess - did you notice that she was wearing a ponytail! If there were a Hilary Hair Alert System, that would certainly have sent it up a notch, no?

Anonymous said...

She's still doing that weird pop-eyed thing when she smiles.

Diane Griffin said...

We've been warned that an Obama administration would be the death of comedy. For that I am sad, but in a way, it makes me so damn happy.

Unknown said...

Don't be hatin' on the coat just because she's not Condi! There will be plenty of matching arm-chair photo-ops, just you wait and see!

Matthew Hubbard said...

This only proves to us what an amazing high-wire act Ursula pulled off in public for so many years. Power suits are dull and predictable but never inappropriate. To be girly and stylish and still convey a serious intent is very difficult.

Being 6'3" tall helps with the serious intent part.

Karen Zipdrive said...

That coat is truly hideous, and that just out of bed hairdo is equally bad.
I guess the Belgians aren't that important to her.

zoe said...

Who is the designer? I want one.

Fran said...

Hillary "Chipmunk Cheeks" looks absolutely anemic here. Did she raid the Queen's closet?
Can you imagine these conversations--

" Love what you've done with the palace! Say, we've got some prisoners, detainees, really , we need to offload.... can you help a Superpower out?
Yes, more champagne please"

dguzman said...

She looks like an A-frame house here--tiny and pointy on top, big and wide on the bottom. Ouch.

Lulu Maude said...

I read somewhere that Hillary is hard to dress because she's such a prude... she has nice boobs, according to designers, but a little cleavage... no way.

Of course, when she was running for Prez, wasn't there a flap about cleavage? It was followed by one of those horrible Laura Bush shirtwaist formals.

Now everyone is freaking out because Michele Obama

Lulu Maude said...

Whoops--got interrupted before I could comment on the current puritanical response to Michele Obama's (beautifully toned) bare lil' arms.

Michael Steele probably masturbates to those images in People magazine.

Anonymous said...

Highly esteemed PSP,

Knowing your understandable morbid fascination with "Dr" Rice's vulgarity and intellectual fraudulence as a yet another illustration of late-imperial Americana, may I still humbly urge you to turn your wit & wisdom to observing, & commenting on, Hillary, so that you can continue to enlighten us, in this darkest of all ages for our Republic, as you do in the above item.

Anonymous said...

Frock unfortunately looks overloaded a bit like the "peregruzka" overload button recently pushed in tandem with Comrade Lavrov.

Should it be reset?

Anonymous said...

Now I know! She should be the fifth Beatle in "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band."

Took this PSP admirer two days to figure it out.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

How dare you hate on Hillary? You're a sexist pig!