Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Alan Keyes Compares McCain to AIDS



Ha, ha! Wheee! Alan Keyes, once again, plays it klassy:


These candidates produced the result the AIDS analogy would lead one to expect. In terms of the conservative constituency of the Republican Party, Sen. McCain is an opportunistic infection that threatens to ravage and destroy its defenseless body. Tragically for America, in the larger context of our national political life he still plays the role of the AIDS virus, masquerading as a republican while opening the way for Barack Obama, the opportunistic infection that will ravage the defenseless body of our republic. If we accept the McCain/Obama choice, we resign the republic to its demise. I guess the "lesser of evils" crowd will take comfort in the notion that though infected with HIV, the patient actually died of pneumonia. Unfortunately, this is false comfort, since the choice they make increases the virulence of the opportunistic infection. In today's political terms, their surrender to moral relativism makes Barack Obama's election to the presidency more and more inevitable.


OMG, and it goes on and on AND ON from there. The editorial is, like, a million words long. Can you get through the whole thing? Are you sure? I can't.

14 comments:

karenzipdrive said...

Has that bitch ever heard of a paragraph?
I only got as far as the first half inch of text- which is a bad, bad way to have to measure how much one has read.

Princess Sparkle Pony said...

I don't know about you, Karen, but I'm frankly surprised he didn't write the whole thing in caps.

FranIAm said...

I made it to about the 3rd paragraph, where he graciously informs us that danger is ahead...

"I see one sign of this prejudice in what has sadly become the commonplace reaction to a political tract such as the one you are about to read. "It's too long (for an article). It's not long enough (for a book). It's too academic (for the masses). It's not scholarly enough (for the academics). People won't have the patience to read it, or the intelligence to understand it. You must make it shorter; make it more accessible, more readable, etc., etc., etc. Can you give me a sound bite? What about a 60 second spot?" It seems that just about the only element of the democratic ethos that unquestionably dominates consciousness these days is a pervasive insistence on lowering the standard of public discourse so that the "common people" can understand."

What the heezy is he on about? And does he not know that no one is listening?

Matty Boy said...

So Alan Keyes is the drug cocktail that makes you sicker and kills you anyway? Is my analogy any goofier than his? Mine is waaay shorter, so that has to count for something.

HRH King Friday XIII said...

Whereas Alan Keyes is like genital warts of the Republican Party. One day he just showed up from whence nobody knows. He comes and goes and is largely ignored until he breaks out on thier collective anus called World Net Daily.

Lau said...

At least Keyes knows that AIDS is caused by HIV, and kills through secondary infections. This may suggest that he is better educated than Dr. Bill Frist.

(And no, I didn't read any of the article. The pony-posted fragment was plenty for me).

dguzman said...

"It's too academic (for the masses)." Um, no, Alan. Actually, it's too insane for the masses to give a shit about.

Anonymous said...

According to my handy word count tool, this mountain of manure comes to 11811 words.

Princess Sparkle Pony said...

Unbelievable. Does he really expect the typical World Net Daily reader to slog through that?

karenzipdrive said...

He doesn't write in paragraphs, he writes in fucking slabs.
He puts me in a cranky mood.

Anonymous said...

Alan Keyes!!!!!

Still crazy after all these years.

usablogger said...

When you can't afford or don't have access to mental health services, Alan Keyes blogs.

Dog Easiness said...

But would he be comfortable in Larry Craig's bed!!!!!!!!!1!?

Distributorcap said...

maybe mccain should make him his veep..... negate the race card

what a guy