Thursday, August 09, 2007

Condibot Needs a Tune-up


U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (R) and Japan's Minister of Defense Yuriko Koike face reporters before their meeting in the Treaty Room of the State Department in Washington August 9, 2007. REUTERS/Yuri Gripas (UNITED STATES)


Oh, dear, this won't do at all! It's easy to see that the above image shows not Condi herself, but the Disneytronic Condibot, the labor-saving device deployed for situations lacking the gravitas which require the involvement of the real Dr. Ferragamo.

But, hello? Condibot science squad? Can you not see that several gaskets and links in the central support structure are slipping and need immediate replacement? I mean, c'mon, that posture is simply embarrassing. Let's get it together, people! The reputation of American robotics is at stake!

21 comments:

dguzman said...

and the cream-colored shoes don't really match the gray suit either. Still--either the Condibot's malfunctioning, or she's actually stooping so as not to make Koike feel so short!? Are you kidding me!? Arrogant American beeyotch.

Also, it looks like Japan sent the YurikoBot to meet Condi--clearly, however, YurikoBot lacks the advanced neural-net processing to even a crack a passable fake smile.

Anonymous said...

Obviously Ms. Koike is there to fix the Condibot, so that she can be even frostier and hard stylish.

Maybe Condi had a really rough night last night and called in sick? Maybe BoyWonder MacKay is having second thoughts and is romancing the clone.

Matthew Hubbard said...

What are those rectangular things on the floor? Or those their marks they are suposed to stand on?

Again, wrong person in front of wrong flag. Grrr!!!!

But let me save my bitterest disappointment for the ultra pointy shoes. I hates me some ultra pointy shoes! From the picture, it looks like these ultra pointy shoes may be designed specifically as weapons, given the color change from the actual foot covering part to the pointy, not covering any section of a normal human's foot part.

Is this new technology? Do they need Condibot specifically as the test subject?

Mary said...

OMG - you're had this blog since 05 and 28,000 profile views?

This is a HOOT! I'll be back! that profile photo is a scream!

Anonymous said...

Condi appears to be holding an invisible wheelbarrow the contents of which are only known to her extraterrestial pals...

Peteykins said...

The invisible wheelbarrow is totally innovative thinking, and I'm deeply impressed.

Matty: Yes, those are their "marks" taped on the floor. And since Condi prefers Ferragamos, well, pointiness comes with the territory.

Mary: You are certainly most welcome!

Distributorcap said...

the condibot looks like she is auditioning for the Leaning Tower of Pisa

Anonymous said...

Oh, please- hasn't any of you ever pushed your ass out so the cheeks separate a bit and you can fart more inobtrusively?
Look at the Japanese woman's face- obviously Condi dealt it but she smelt it.
I am shocked nobody sorted this out yet.

You're welcome!

Anonymous said...

zipdrive, if you're right, I'm glad there's audio...

Kelster93 said...

At least we have the technology to ensure that the Condibot's jacket is free of gap-osis when buttoned.

BTW, we all know the shoes are extra-pointy 'cause they're made from elf skins.

Anonymous said...

Where is Ursula?

wassonii said...

pointy or no, their shoes seem to have come from the same dyed patch of leather.

Jess Wundrun said...

ZOMFG!!! Karen is like, totally on to it. Condi farted so bad it curled her own toes. When it hits the other lady her toes will curl too.

Getting a reaction like that to your own farts takes some doin'.

Fran said...

I think the 'Bot is getting ready to dance to Herbie Hancock's Rockit.

Peteykins said...

OMG, how great would that be? Franiam, you just blew my mind!

Fran said...

Aw shucks PSP! I actually wrote a far more pithy comment the other day but it did not take, that was all I could salvage from it yesterday.

Maybe that was all that was needed.

I must say that ever since you posted this I have had that song stuck in my head and a bizarre vision of our 'Bot -o-licious one doing the robo-dance stuck right along there with it.

If I had any talent around creating video, that would be up on YouTube post haste.

Anyone out there up for the job? Distributorcap and BirthdayBoy, where are you??

Matthew Hubbard said...

karenzipdrive stated the obvious while all the rest of us were oblivious. The tiny fists of fury give it all away!

Points to karenzipdrive.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations to Yurikobot for winning this round. Condibot put up a good fight.

Join us in the next episode of Battlebots when we move to the semifinals: the long awaited matchup of Yurikobot v. Tzipibot!!!

Anonymous said...

Thanks, kids!

Unknown said...

Condibot's fists also seem to be in a clenched, stroke like contortion.

Christopher1974 said...

THe YurikoBot has a very respectable smile for a Japanese woman -- never show your teeth! And coupled with the much improved posture and positioning of the hands -- again the Japanese have shown their superiority when it comes to diplomacy, robotics and the intersection thereof. Sigh. We've lost our edge.