Friday, August 12, 2011

You Can Learn A Lot About Sarah Palin By Staring At Her Bangs

(AP Photo. Click for bigger!)

I'm glad that this blog has gotten back to the things that really matter: hairdos! That's, obv, Sarah Palin earlier today at the Iowa State Fair. She's staring at a cow or something, wondering what it is, I don't know. What goes through Sarah Palin's peculiar mind? I imagine her thoughts to be like many little miniature Ty-D-Bol guys in their little boats sloshing around in an erratic sea, forever just out of hearing distance from each other, unable to communicate or correspond in any way.

Hellooooooooooo... Can anybody heeeeear meeeeeeeee...

And covering and protecting those thoughts is the Palin hairdo. What is that? Octo-fringe?  It's like tarantulas resting on her forehead. There's something so fake-casual about it, this hairdo is really annoying me. It's so manicured to look tousled. And if you click to see the larger picture, you'll see that the dye-job is quite elaborate and multicolored. This says something about Sarah Palin.


21 comments:

Comrade PhysioProf said...

I've been in the salon when people have got their hair dyed like that, and the dye artist actually has to separate the hair into a huge number of little bundles, each of which gets a separate schmear of different dye mixes.

Fran said...

Tiny bundles of bangs!

Comrade PhysioProf said...

Bangly, bundly, tiny frissons of hair!

Anonymous said...

So what do you think, Peteykins, is it a hairpiece?

It sure looks different today than it did the last couple of times she was on FOX news.

Anonymous said...

Peteykins, in other personal grooming news:

http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/08/12/behind-bachmanns-debate-disappearance/#more-163401

Where did Bachmann disappear to during the debate's commercial breaks?

To touch up her make-up!

Anonymous said...

Aw, crap, did I just miss your earlier post? I'm a doofus!

sfmike said...

Thank you for this extremely important update. I had a friend who an irrational hated for women who wore ponytails after a certain age, particularly when they were sticking out of the back of caps. After this photo, I'm going to be feeling the same way towards anyone with elaborately dyed bangs that are meant to look "natural."

Anonymous said...

Do her glasses keep the bangs from stabbing her in the eye? Is some of it temporary color enhancement? Were these the only two things Sarah thought about on the bus?

The Cat's Meow said...

I want to know why this woman, who is soooooo strong on "family values," is in Iowa right now. She's not a candidate, but more important, her son "Track" and his wife just had a baby. The first Palin grandbaby actually born in wedlock! (Although just barely.) Why isn't Palin in Alaska with that family she adores so much? Hmmmm.... do we think we know the answer?

Anonymous said...

Um, does her tour bus have a mortar mixer on the trailer hitch to mix her make up foundation? She is wearing a huge amount of make up.. The amount of make up and foundation is really, really high, She definitely looks like she spends an hour or two in the make up chair before leaving for her events, like the one where Paul Revere was defending the Second Amendment..

The bangs were done to hide her wrinkles, or take people’s attention away from her forehead and crow’s feet, or to downplay her botox injections.

Sharkbabe said...

cheap dumb boring slut. us 7th grade girls could spot it, why can't our grownup media? oh never mind, they're cheap dumb boring sluts themselves, makes sense now.

Cranky Old Batt said...

It took me awhile but I figured it out: this is what you get when an older woman tries way to hard to pass for a much younger one.

Old Rebel said...

It's appropriate that Palin would get a Cthulu hairstyle.

j said...

Ok, yes, excellent analysis.

But I really need to know what the heck is on that damn t shirt of hers! Here it appears to be some cutesy little mom stick figure thing maybe: http://photos.denverpost.com/mediacenter/2011/08/stumping-at-the-iowa-state-fair-august-12-2011/#5

And then in a different shot we can see that the stick figure is wearing a giant diamond ring. Whaaat is this? What does that damn text say in the first pic? http://photos.denverpost.com/mediacenter/2011/08/stumping-at-the-iowa-state-fair-august-12-2011/#7 Frantically searching for other pics of her in this top.

j said...

Ok, update. The t-shirt says "I am MOM" on the back. And has another little phrase (with three "I am's") on the front and some platitude about love on the back neck. http://peaceloveworld.com/index.php/i-am-mom-white-burnout-v-neck-tee-w-pocket-3951-PDPA.html

"I am" of course means "I am running for president!" according to most of the google results when trying to track down this tee.

Here's some insight from the Free Republic forum-tariat: "Obama copied her bus trip and wants to copy her documentary. Soon he will copy her shirt

Look for Obama to show up wearing a shirt with “I is “ written on it."

Sorry for comment-bombing but that t shirt is just too good! Goes with the hair and is just as rich a text for analysis.

Peteykins said...

Oh, thanks. I was puzzled by the t-shirt, too, but not enough to really look into it. I was sure it was some kind of product placement. Thanks for the report!

Also, I LOVE the whole thing were Republicans accuse Obama of "copying" Sarah Palin by having a bus tour, as if Sarah Palin is the first politician to ever do so. Obama himself did a bus tour before the election in 2008!

Lady Wesley said...

Her hair just looks dirty to me.

And did ya see the black & white polka dot toe nails. American will never elect a President with polka dot toe nails.

samael7 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
samael7 said...

Never mind. Bad link. Just picture Joanna Lumley as Patsy Stone here, and you get 9/10ths of the humor I was going for about bangs.

Lazy Media said...

When eyeglass lenses don't distort your eyes AT ALL, that means they're not actually prescription lenses. Those must be safety goggles that she wears at all times, just in case she needs to do a chemistry experiment.

Tim said...

Noodly appendages of bangs! Is she a secret devotee of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?