Friday, November 26, 2010

Frederica Wilson Just Wants To Wear Her Hats, OK?

(Photos: various sources)

Frederica Wilson just may be your next big PSP starlet. She's that rarest of creatures: a Democrat elected to Congress, and she is VERY concerned about bringing her hat collection to Washington:

Wilson is hoping to have a conversation with the likely new Speaker, John Boehner. At issue: whether or not the longtime lawmaker can wear her signature hats on the House floor. The House bars members from wearing hats while the body is in session, but Wilson said she believes the speaker can waive the rule -- which dates to the 1800s.

"It's sexist," Wilson said. "It dates back to when men wore hats and we know that men don't wear hats indoors, but women wear hats indoors. Hats are what I wear. People get excited when they see the hats. Once you get accustomed to it, it's just me. Some people wear wigs, or high heel shoes or big earrings or pins. This is just me."

Is that too much to ask? See, it's sexist that women aren't allowed to wear hats indoors while men... also aren't allowed to wear hats indoors. So totally sexist that men and women are treated equally in this regard!

She's right, though, that "people get excited when they see the hats." I'm pretty excited right now, aren't you? Don't deny it.

Mediasnack seems to think that Ms. Wilson is being silly about her beloved hats, but I think they're just being mean. Others will say that Frederica is a blatantly ridiculous creature, but those who do aren't sensitive to the needs of satirical blogs, and that's just more discrimination. The hats are obviously her source of power, like Samson's hair. How is she to function without them?

This is clearly an outrage.

The obvious solution: Wilson should get a special dispensation by declaring her hats to be helper animals. Problem solved.


Anonymous said...

Petykins,I believe a lady should be allowed her hat anywhere and anytime she chooses, but in the interest of good taste and common decency she should be required to be actually sitting on a horse while wearing those cowboy hats.

Fran said...

Frederica is a creature made for this blog. If I were her, I might tell John Boehner to do something in his own hat and then pull it over his orange-y ears.

But hey, that's just me.

LIBear said...

Did Bella Abzug ever where a hat? On the floor of the House I mean. Lord knows that woman wore a hat!

Matty Boy said...

LlBear asks the germane question. What was the rule for Bella Abzug? I searched Google and Bing for Bella Abzug without a hat and came up with nothing.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Rosa Rosales, the hot tempered president of LULAC, always wears a hat, too.
Indoors, outdoors, she's got her hat on. It's her trademark, and the more pissed off she is at a news conference, the bigger and brighter the hat. Her hats are like pressure gauges.
I think a wig or a toupee is sort of a hat. So, if Ms. Wilson is forbidden from wearing her hat on the House floor, then no wigs or rugs should be allowed either.

desertwind said...

I second that emotion. She's fabulous and must be allowed her hats on the floor.

And, if Frederica gets a special compensation EVERYBODY else will want one, too. You just know white Republican congress people will not stand for a black woman getting affirmative action.

Oh the teabag hats we'd see. On the floor of congress! Just like at conventions & rallies. And that's only on the men.

Plus: sports team hats, plastic Elvis wigs, Tricorners, trucker hats, state hats (shape of state, flower, animal, bird), witches hats, more bad toupees.

So undignified.

It gets my vote!

sfmike said...

In California they are called "service animals" and you should see some of the creatures crazy people haul around on public buses and in public buildings in San Francisco. Iguanas, vicious Chihuahuas, mean parrots, you name it. And it's all legal as long as you call it a "service animal." So your suggestion for Ms. Wilson is sorta beyond brilliant.

Comrade PhysioProf said...

Those are some BADDE-ASSE hats!

Maddiane said...

I think it would be bitchen if every member of congress wore one of these...

Anonymous said...

I think Ms. Wilson should wear a teabagger hat on the floor and see what the Orange Eyeliner man does. Would he deny her right to wear it, and risk getting sympathetic teabaggers up in arms? How delicious!

It could be a tri-corner chapeau but I'm thinking particularly about the lady Keith Olbermann always shows... wearing a big straw hat with about six teabags hanging from it.

HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...

Personally, I think all Members of Congress should be required to wear clown noses while on the floor.

samael7 said...

Let Frederica be Frederica. She's got a look, and she knows it works for her. A loud, proud, be-hatted Congresswoman is what this country needs right now!