(Photos: various sources)
Frederica Wilson just may be your next big PSP starlet. She's that rarest of creatures: a Democrat elected to Congress, and she is VERY concerned about bringing her hat collection to Washington:
Wilson is hoping to have a conversation with the likely new Speaker, John Boehner. At issue: whether or not the longtime lawmaker can wear her signature hats on the House floor. The House bars members from wearing hats while the body is in session, but Wilson said she believes the speaker can waive the rule -- which dates to the 1800s.
"It's sexist," Wilson said. "It dates back to when men wore hats and we know that men don't wear hats indoors, but women wear hats indoors. Hats are what I wear. People get excited when they see the hats. Once you get accustomed to it, it's just me. Some people wear wigs, or high heel shoes or big earrings or pins. This is just me."
Is that too much to ask? See, it's sexist that women aren't allowed to wear hats indoors while men... also aren't allowed to wear hats indoors. So totally sexist that men and women are treated equally in this regard!
She's right, though, that "people get excited when they see the hats." I'm pretty excited right now, aren't you? Don't deny it.
Mediasnack seems to think that Ms. Wilson is being silly about her beloved hats, but I think they're just being mean. Others will say that Frederica is a blatantly ridiculous creature, but those who do aren't sensitive to the needs of satirical blogs, and that's just more discrimination. The hats are obviously her source of power, like Samson's hair. How is she to function without them?
This is clearly an outrage.
The obvious solution: Wilson should get a special dispensation by declaring her hats to be helper animals. Problem solved.