Finally, a Prayer Group for Me!

Forget the poor! Why waste valuable prayer time on dowdy nobodies? Wouldn't you rather say some prayers for Jessica Alba or Heath Ledger? Well then, please direct your attention to the Hollywood Prayer Network. Whether it's real or satire, it's brilliant. A selections from their FAQs:

How can I pray for celebrities?

First of all, don’t be embarrassed or ashamed to want to pray for celebrities. They are changing our culture and they need prayer! Just go to God, remembering that these people are just like you and those in your community, except the whole world is watching everything they do and say. This makes them insecure, arrogant, angry, nervous, uncomfortable in public, clingy to one another and even paranoid. God didn’t mean for man to have the glory and so our prayers are needed to help these people see that God is the only one who can handle it and that’s why they need Him – along with His unconditional love, which they crave but don’t know it. HPN has the INCOGNITO PRAYER TEAM which organizes and encourages prayer warriors from around the world to pray for the celebrities of their choice and then we try to send you updated information on that person so that you can be more specific and effective with your prayers.

I'm going to pray for fantastic Pia Zadora!

EDIT: Ooh, ooh, I wonder if that priest who was stalking Conan O'Brien knew about all the helpful tips on this site?