Tuesday, April 01, 2008

OMG Superfantastic New Condicise Extravaganza

In this photo provided by Fitness magazine, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice exercises under the watchful eye of her trainer Thomas Tomlo at the gym at the State Department in Washington, Thursday, Nov. 15, 2007. (AP Photo/Fitness, David Y. Lee)

Yes! A special Condicise issue of Fitness Magazine! I can hardly speak I'm so excited by these photos. OMG another, this time with Fitness EIC Denise Brodey:

Another one via Portfolio:

My favorite part of the AP report:

Known for a keen fashion sense that runs to Armani and Ferragamo, she is pictured wearing lavender gym shorts and sneakers.

My goodness! Where on earth did people get the impression that Condi likes Ferragamo?

UPDATE! One more, the best yet, from The Atlantic:

UPDATE! Pony Pal jterry points out in the comments something wonderful I can't believe I didn't notice: "the best part is the invisible spherical friend has turned green!" Best Condicising side effect EVER! Well, it's either that or the green ball is simply a tool to exercise her invisible-friend-clenching muscles?

UPDATE! I found myself wondering what else Condi did on the day she executed this ridiculous press outreach. Let's just say that a quick look explained a lot.

UPDATE! The Condicise Workout is now online at Fitness Magazine, but would you believe without the pictures? OMG, this is sooo totally embarrassing because now I'll have to go to the store and purchase Fitness Magazine.


Fran said...


I am speechless.

Someone, get me a gatorade. Stat.

Anonymous said...

Now all that's left to do is a fitness interview with Condibot & Dumbya working out together, with Laura "Crazy Eyes" as the dominatrix, I mean, trainer.

Anonymous said...

Sparkles, does the Hairdo Alert System change when Condi's working out? Frankly I am not sure if it should go lower or higher. What do you think?



jterry said...

OMG! I love the ponytail of success. And the stern look for the heavy-thing-pushing (what, I don't work out). But the best part is the invisible spherical friend has turned green!

Oh, and the trainer ain't bad either.

Anonymous said...

whew, I sure am glad that my tax dollars are paying for Thomas to be stepping on someone's toes. too bad they're not mine.

Anonymous said...

In all seriousness, it is great that Condi keeps fit, especially since 60% of Americans are sedentary and are overweight/obese.

I am a certified fitness trainer, who only works with people who are overweight/obese and are sedentary. This is the kind of publicity that makes my job harder. Research shows you do not need to engage in this level of fitness to reap the benefits of exercise. Everyone can exercise at any age, any weight, and any functional capacity. Exercise does not have to look or be this painful.

Furthermore, I think it is ridiculous that our top diplomat rather give a fitness interview than to appear before Congress or give a frank and honest interview about the US failed, callow foreign policy that she has made a mess of because of her arrogance.

The premise is that she is a role model for fitness and health. But, the President has a Physical Activity Council that should be the "face" of fitness and health, not our Secretary of State. Let me reiterate, it is admirable that she keeps herself in good physical shape, especially for a 50+ year old.

We wonder why women are never satisfied with their bodies and why a lot of people say, "why bother" and have a defeatist attitude toward exercise. Also, a lot of women have competing demands, such as children, husband/partner, work, church, etc.

Now for some sarcasm, have you seen the trailer for "Courting Condi?" It is a docu-comedy. In it, Rick Upchurch--the only guy Condi was ever engaged to states that Condi does not believe in premarital sex. He gives the impression that she is a virgin--not that anything is wrong with that. Perhaps, she is working off her frustration. Here is the link: http://www.courtingcondi.com/Trailer_2.html

And for heaven's sake Condi, come out of the closet, already.

Anonymous said...

These pictures give me wrong thoughts.

zoe said...

1) These pictures do not give me wrong thoughts.
2) She is SO not Ferragamo any longer - that went out with Katrina. She is strictly Manolo and Jimmy Choo. (like anyone gives a fuck)
3) Agree with anonymous ---- she should be spending her time doing SOS work, not photo ops with Fitness magazine (which, I believe used to be owned by Joe Weider)

Anonymous said...

Does it mention her dalliance with blond haired Notre Dame football stud John Dubenetzky in the courting condi movie?

dguzman said...

I think I'd rather see a documentary called "Condi in Court" for high crimes and misdemeanors. Feel the burn, Condi!

BTW: What do you think: 'roids, or no 'roids? Those arms certainly look muscular.

Jess Wundrun said...

I think the invisible spherical friend's visibility is activated by sweat.

And we all know we almost never see Condi sweat.

Anonymous said...

when the upper lip disappears like that she looks like Michael Jackson! but her moonwalk is better.

Anonymous said...

Condi's blonde-haired boyfriend, John Dubenetzky, died in 2006.


Anonymous said...

Like Condi, I too choose pearl studs when I exercise.