Well, it turns out that Chirac was placing his mouth on almost all the Diplomatrixes, just running around right and left, forcing his lips on each and every lady's quivering and no-doubt appreciative hands. Here's a delightful account of all the hot French action, with one jealous Diplomatrix hilariously left out, from the Mirror:
BET you've never seen French charm vanish so quickly...
President Jacques Chirac plants lingering kisses on the hands of women dignitaries from around the world - then resorts to a firm handshake for Margaret Beckett.
The 74-year-old smoothie warmly welcomes Austrian foreign minister Ursula Plassnik, Greek counterpart Dora Bakoyannis and Canada's Josee Verner at a Lebanon conference in Paris.
He even gave US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice the full Chirac treatment, despite his fierce opposition to the Iraq war.
But the idea of getting personal with our own Foreign Secretary seemed to turn him cold.
Really, what have the others got that Margaret hasn't?
And sure enough, here Chirac is bestowing his hot lips on Dora Bakoyannis:
And not only kissing, but seemingly trying to inhale hot (yet Canadian) Josee (OMG, Josee!!!!) Verner's fingers:
But Mags? Put 'er there, fella:
What do the others have that Mags lacks? Oh, England, don't make me say it.