Quickie: Vanity Fair Discovers Photoshop, Fails To Find Color Adjustment Features

There is something inherently humorous about Vanity Fair's Republican Beefcake Calendar, a fake "hunk of the month" type deal featuring such horrors as John Boehner in a Speedo. My only problem is that the Photoshopping is really, REALLY bad! None of them look as convincing as, for instance, my Dirty Pictures of Dick Cheney™, and I'm hardly a master of the art of the head-swap. I have to assume that Vanity Fair can afford to hire a better Photoshopper, so who is to blame for this embarrassment? An intern? Or did they do it badly on purpose?

Dick Cheney: Anything Goes

Matt Barber, director of cultural affairs with Liberty Counsel, says Cheney's love for his lesbian daughter has "clouded his judgment."

"If freedom to marry means, as he said, that people ought to be free to enter into any kind of union they wish, well then, he's virtually endorsing polyamory and polygamy, and incestuous marriage, and bestiality," Barber claims. "[There are] no holds barred here."

Noted!

Also, warning: if you click on the "dirty pictures of Dick Cheney" link, well, you get exactly what you deserve.

Have a Relaxing Weekend!

Ramblin' Dick Cheney Attends Flower Levitating Ceremony, Resembles Mickey Rooney

US Vice President Dick Cheney, left, meets with Omani Minister for Foreign Affairs Yousif bin Alawi Abdullah, at Muscat's Royal Airport, Tuesday Feb. 27, 2007. Earlier, a suicide bomber attacked the entrance to the main U.S. military base in Afghanistan during a visit by Cheney, killing up to 23 people and wounding 20. Cheney was unhurt in the attack, which was claimed by the Taliban and was the closest that militants have come to a top U.S. official visiting Afghanistan. (AP Photo/Hamid AlQasmi)

Did the Vice President even notice that he escaped an assassination attempt today? He doesn't seem particularly traumatized here other than that whole deal where he looks like he aged fifteen years in one week. I'm relieved that the unpleasantness didn't interfere with this superb photo-op.

And that got me thinking that it's so exciting, really, for Cheney to be such a media-whore these days. He's everywhere! Remember how invisible he was for, like, three years after 9-11? But, gosh, lately he's been globe-hopping, on TV, talked about in some trial that's going on and... well, just everything is coming up Dick! I love it! Please click the "dirty pictures of Dick Cheney" tag below to relive some of my most intimate and revealing fantasies (not really safe for work) involving this suddenly showboating superstar.

Also, duh, how cool is that Omani minister? Is he really carrying a sword? Or a scroll? Whatever it is, I'm sure it's spicy. I've got to say that after viewing literally hundreds (maybe thousands by now) of photo-ops like this, I'm impressed by this sublime couch setup, and dreamy Yousif is easily one of the most dashing photo-op jockeys ever. Well done! Wouldn't you love to see him hit the matching armchairs scene with Condi? Oh, behave!

Cheerleader

Dick Cheney Thinks a Little Bit of Torture is A-OK

How Did You Get So Sexy, Dick Cheney?

Please accept my apologies.