Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Condibots On The Loose? Condibots On The Loose!

(Photo: Wayne Armstrong)

Seems like a drag of a new Condi sighting: there she is, plopped in a chair at a groundbreaking for what sounds suspiciously like the new most boring place on earth, the Joseph Korbel School of International Studies at the University of Denver. This is as routine as Condigigs get.

Or so you thought! See, if you are a close Condiwatcher like me and, I suspect, most readers of this blog, things can get strange in Condiland pretty quickly:

Rice said the new complex “will allow this great school to push forward — it will allow this school to find more Condi Rices who are searching out there for what they might do and decide that they belong in a world quite different from their own. A world that is increasingly complex, increasingly diverse, and therefore needs the diversity of talents and people who can find and make sense of our common humanity when so much tries to tear us apart.

Wait, whhhhhat? What's all this about more Condi Rices out there? What is she saying, exactly?

I have a theory.

Long-time Pony Pals know of the existence of the Condibots, those labor-saving, Disneytronic artificial Condoleezzas frequently sent out on routine missions (they were particularly useful to the Bush administration). But isn't this boring groundbreaking just exactly the kind of dud for which the Condibots were developed? 

No, this is the real Condi at this dreadful broad-daylight event. Why? Because the Condibots have escaped! You heard her! "More Condi Rices" out there! She said it plain as day.

Let's emphasize what has happened:


So what they've doing is this, and it's clever: they're building this really boring and pointless foreign policy center to lurrrrre in the escaped Condibots so that they can be recaptured!

See? That's how a boring Condi story becomes a GREAT Condi story, when you know enough to read between the lines before falling asleep.

Watch out for the Condibots! They're out there somewhere! I bet right now they're wandering aimlessly around an alley behind the Heritage Foundation headquarters.


dinthebeast said...

The air-raid siren at the Bayer Complex has been going off at weird times of day all week. I've been making jokes about the clones getting out. Do you suppose it was the Condibots instead?

-Doug in Oakland

Peteykins said...


Fearsome Beard said...

Is it possible by letting them escape that one of them may try to be a running mate? More equals more chances...correct?

Peteykins said...

More Condi Veep Rumors! I totally approve.

HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...

Just imagine all of the "A.I." al la Steven Spielberg/Stanley Kubrick inspired adventures the Condibots will embark on! What does it mean to be a robot living in a town filled with bureaucrats? Can diplomats feel love?

Anonymous said...

Please tell me there are more Callie-Lous out there too!

samael7 said...

Primed by the blog entry title, I misread your first sentence, mistaking "drag" as a collective noun. You know, "a murder of crows," "a parliament of owls" and all that. Hence "a drag of Condibots."

Which made a kind of sense, although I thought that was still too fabulous a name. And then comprehension kicked in.

Anonymous said...

In the mile-high city, Rice went to a then-minor heartland learnery, the University of Denver. ('Very few people go from a doctorate at the University of Denver to a first class research university, said Donald Kennedy, Stanford president from 1980 to 1992.) ...

Korbel was a defender, according to Mabry, of the Stalin-Hitler pact, which the Central European-born professor saw 'as another example of Stalin's strategic genius and his success in building the Soviet state.' According to Elizabeth Bumiller, when Rice heard him lecture, she

'fell in love' -- the phrase she has used in virtually every interview she has given about this moment in her life. ...

The lecture that so transfixed Rice was about the ruthless maneuvering and consolidation of power that allowed Stalin to propel himself from general secretary of the Communist Party to effective dictator of the Soviet Union. ... Terry Karl, a Stanford political science professor who later taught with Rice, [said] ... 'Like some political scientists of the time, she was impressed with the efficiency and effectiveness of how the Communist parties exercised power."

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