Wednesday, January 28, 2009

I Keep Track of Yulia Tymoshenko's Hair Wreath So You Don't Have To


Ukrainian Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko speaks to the media after the signing of a gas deal in Moscow, Russia, Monday, Jan. 19, 2009, shortly after their talks. Russia and Ukraine on Monday signed a deal that restores natural gas shipments to Ukraine and paves the way for an end to the nearly two-week cutoff of most Russian gas to a freezing Europe. (AP Photo/Alexander Zemlianichenko)


Let's face it, 2008 was a rough year for this blog. First we lost Ursula Plassnik when she stepped down as Austria's foreign minister and, frustratingly, disappeared completely from public view; then we voted in a new administration which so far appears to be lacking in sartorial hilarity; next, promising starlet Bill Richardson decided not to move to Washington; finally, Condi's reign of terror fabulousness ended not with a bang (dang that Peter McKay!) but with a whimper.

What this blog needs is a replacement superstar. The ideal candidate would be a constantly-photographed public figure, one who makes unusual/hilarious fashion choices, and above all, one who has really, totally weird hair. And then it struck* me: Yulia! And she's been there all this time! Hiding in plain sight!

And it's not like I've totally ignored the mind-boggling Ukrainian head of state. After all, I featured the back of her breathtaking hairdo last year because Pony Pals™ demanded it. Furthermore, it'll be easy and fun because the photographers LOVE HER and she loves them. And even more, Yulia loves herself, as evidenced by her extraordinary personal web page, a site which will make your heart explode with joy.

So anyway, I sure hope you like Yulia! You're going to be seeing a lot of her! YAY.

*I owe a lot to a Pony Pal™ who recently reminded me about Yulia, but now I can't seem to find the post wherein she did so. Please step forward and take a bow! You have done this blog a great service.

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yulia moves my uvula!

Anonymous said...

Oooh, a geiger counter brooch!

Diane Griffin said...

Yeah, that brooch is what I just came back to comment on. It's really strange! love it! Exclamation point.

Diane Griffin said...

I had to come back again and say -- Oooh! Tymoshenko wallpapers! Awesome!

Peteykins said...

Her web site is totally mind blowing. So good!

samael7 said...

That brooch is legendary. Hmm, how does it go?

"The Brooch of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth . . . and good hairdos are long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again."

samael7 said...

*GASP*! Actual headline from the website:

Braid of Tymoshenko gets its own perfume

NOT KIDDING!

The Sparkle is strong in this one...

Peteykins said...

Samael, I know, it's like I don't even know where to start.

Anonymous said...

OMG, her wallpapers! The heart graffiti! The motorcycle! The engineering degree! The arrest! The arrest becoming not actually an arrest! She was the third most powerful woman in the world in 2005 (behind Condi)! (Hey, how could I resist reading her biography?)

Princess, this woman wins. I mean... so. much. sparkle.

Whitney said...

I just had to throw in my two cents about those wonderful wallpapers. I've got the motorcycle one up now.

Lulu Maude said...

Fine, but if you're going to wreath the hair, touch up the roots first.

Do you think Ann Coulter would look nicer if she got all Christmasy?

Inferno said...

And even more, Yulia loves herself

Aww, I love Yulia too. Who wouldn't love her?

But sadly, this won't be quite as entertaining as Ursula and her scarves or Condi and...well, everything. Hopefully, someone in the States steps up and is entertaining? Kirsten Gillibrand, perhaps? Maybe Roland Burris? Maybe even Timothy Geithner?

Blagojevich, while his hairdo is impressive (seriously, did you only increase its mass 40% in that composition with MLK, Gandhi, and Nelson Mandela?), isn't quite fabulous enough sartorially to track. Let's see...David Paterson could easily qualify for a beard watch (everyone focuses on his eyes, but that is some impressive growth for a pol on the chin). And Mooselini could easily earn her own spot, but she's just too easy and hasn't done too much of note that's mockable lately. (I mean, she should have just gone all-in and named her PAC JoeSixPAC, as some wit on Fark suggested.)

Besides, I'm convinced she remains so slender because she feeds off the attention she receives on the Internet and that alone, so.

Matthew Hubbard said...

I think we know how I feel about Ursula, but if we are going to have a replacement Euro diplo-babe, Yulia is an excellent choice. I think the brooch may be a birth control device.

And her skin! So pale and lovely! She may be a secret Twilight fan going for the vampire groupie look.

Mistress Cynica said...

OMG, the photo section of her website has 8,112 pictures, including today's "Princess Leia" look! This is going to be awesome. Go PSP!!

Stephanie said...

I adore Yulia! We get lots of TV coverage of her here on BBC and the other intn'l news outlets. When was the last time a gas crisis was this much fun to watch?

Anonymous said...

Best wallpaper ever.

Drama Queen said...

Teeny problem with the roots but I won't hold it against her. After all, she probably doesn't have a professional stylist on staff . . . or does she?

Anonymous said...

Wow! Her photo album even includes shots of her proving that her "do" is a "Real Braid"!

Tada! said...

Oh, this is all going to be good. I have just the roots to emulate her; alas, I don't have enough hair for a wreath.

HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...

In Soviet Russia, hair braids you!

dguzman said...

You've really set yourself one immense task here, Princess. Where DO you start? The "Help me Obiwan, you're my only hope!" outfit, or the "I do not seek power" lol quote, or the motorcycle wallpaper? The mind reels.

All I can say is, those sparkly hooves are going to be dancing like crazy keeping up with this one.

dguzman said...

Sorry to double-comment, but my god, there's just SO MUCH on that site! Who knew Gene Hackman had become a Russian Orthodox thingie? Or that the immortal words that inspired Ukraine Unity Day were the enigmatic "On January 22, 1919 in Sofiya Square in Kyiv the following words were heard “Henceforth, estranged by centuries from each other the parts of united Ukraine run into." Um--what?

Princess--we thank you. We are simply not worthy!

Anonymous said...

This is a traditional Ukrainian hairstyle, which Tymoshenko has adopted for political purposes, according to the NYT:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/07/fashion/07braid.html

But for some reason it just reminds me of a loaf of fancy bread. Leia had her cinnamon buns, and Yulia has -- what? Challah?

Glennis said...

Oh my god. Why do I have to go to work now? I'd rather stay home and read Yulia's site.

Does she have a french manicure in that photos?

Anonymous said...

Can't even get out of the "portraits' section. Yulia was once BRUNETTE (2002)! The mind boggles.

Matthew Hubbard said...

In recent news, John Cleese's girlfriend, who claimed she was 27, turned out to be 45. (He's pushing 70.) I saw a picture of her and thought, those were 27 very tough years.

On the other hand, Yulia is 48! If you told me she was in her early 30's, I'd totally believe you!

I can't stop using exclamation points! I've got Tymoshenko Fever!

Anonymous said...

109 pages in the photo section!!!

Inferno said...

On the other hand, Yulia is 48! If you told me she was in her early 30's, I'd totally believe you!

She's WHAT?

Get the fuck out. Girlfriend's older than the Obamas?

...DAMN she looks fine.

Excuse me for a second, I may have to go over to her site for some research.

Anonymous said...

Must be marketed: the Yulia dildo, for women who love themselves ...

Anonymous said...

"It looks like that in addition to all other things braid of Yulia Tymoshenko has got its own perfume – created by one of the front-rank American designers Narcisso Rodriguez. Rodriguez, who was successful in working with Donna Karan and Kelvin Klein, did musk the dominant aroma of new line. And for advertising of his new product craftsman had chosen the face of popular world model Karmen Kass. However, one can not help but notice a very familiar hairstyle of the slender blond."

that's from yulia's website - truly madly fantastic and awesome.

OhMyHeart said...

Oh my goodnessss I love her homepage. I think we're going to fashion our blog's redesign after it. Yummy yummy pink!!

Anonymous said...

Well, she IS an expert on natural gas.

Jenn Thomas said...

This is the best news I've had all year. I've been stalking Yulia's website and news appearances for a while now, and the union of my two favorite Princesses (I consider YT my Orange Princess of Democracy) promises to be fruitful.

May I suggest tracking the height of her pumps when she meets with Putin? The lovely Yulia always wears fantastic shoes, but I swear the platforms get taller and more obvious when meeting with Lilli-Putin. During the recent gas-row negotiations, however, they seemed a bit more restrained -- either that or he had higher lifts than usual! (Not that I compulsively save photos of them together. That would be weird.)

Anonymous said...

I can't decide whether the braid resembles a baked good, or some sublime sea creature.

Fran said...

Yes, you found a goldmine of sparkle.... but don't discount domestic politicos.
Condi's replacement- what she lacks in sparkle, she may make up for in gaffes. Hill off the hill a whole new set of adventures. Maybe a pantsuit of the month award?

And Pelosi... she has more of a strange possessed Voodoo.... but facial expressions alone, and perhaps a secret blinking eye code language, warrant some visits on the Sisterhood of the traveling pantsuits.

Combined they have nothing on T's hair wreath...
but amusement none the less.

Lulu Maude said...

You've really hit a nerve, haven't you?!?

I love regeneration! It's so... regenerative!

Anonymous said...

OMG, she is a living Hummel Figurine!! Thank you PSP!! We love you