Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Exciting News! Yay! Yay! Yay!

How can the best get better? OK, so you've heard of One News Now, right? It's the American Family Association's wonderful "news" site, their expanded inheritor to the fondly-remembered Agape Press, and a constant, dependable source of material for this blog (and I certainly couldn't have gotten through my guest stint at Wonkette without it!).

Anyway! They've now added comment fields to every single article in what is sure to be a short-lived experiment, like when Jeff Gannon briefly and humorously added them to his limp noodle of a blog. And I have no idea if the following comment is real or not, but it promises chuckles aplenty to come:



Now that is comedy gold! OMG, I can hardly decide which article to comment on first!

My personal favorite:
IF JIMMY CARTER HAD BEEN IN OFFICE WHEN THE 9/11
ATTACKS HAPPENED,THIS COUNTRY WOULD HAVE BEEN
UNDER CONTROL BY THE MUSLIM'S. GEORGE BUSH IS
THE KIND OF GOD-FEARING PRESIDENT THIS COUNTRY
HAS NEEDED FOR A LONG TIME. GEORGE BUSH DONE
THE RIGHT THING IN MY EYES WHEN HE INVADED IRAQ.
ALL THE DEMOCRATS WANT TO DO IS BOW DOWN TO
ANYONE THAT HAS A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION WITH
THEM. THEY DON'T HAVE ENOUGH BACKBONE TO STAND
UP AND FIGHT BACK. GEORGE BUSH IS ONE OF THE
BEST PRESIDENT'S THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
HAS EVER SEEN, AND I AM PROUD TO SAY I VOTED
FOR HIM IN BOTH ELECTIONS. AS FAR AS JIMMY CARTER IS CONCERNED HE SHOULD KEEP HIS MOUTH
SHUT AND LET THE GROWN-UPS DO THE TALKING.

14 comments:

Matthew Hubbard said...

The late Herb Caen had a regular feature called The Apostrophe Police. I know it's elitist to whine about spelling and punctuation, but honestly, it's very hard NOT to think of the 28% of people still supporting Bush as the crowd below a certain line in terms of intelligence and other higher traits separating us from the meerkats.

(I know I'm going to get an earful from the pro-meerkat crowd now. Sure, they're cute, but they are also vicious vermin. Subtext, people subtext!)

Sister Nancy Beth Eczema said...

I felt like something truly precious was lost to us once Agape Press became the more uptown OneNewsNow, but these comments just might return it to its humble (& batshit crazy) roots. Praise Him!

Anonymous said...

Wow. Or Eeeuw. Not sure which. I dove on in and read the comments on the article about how outrageous it was that illegal immigrants asked to be paid for work that they did at a factory that got busted in a raid.

The immigrants' lawyer said that regardless of their work status, we do not condone slavery in this country, thus they must be paid for their work. Knuckle draggers and mouth breathers alike say "Hell NO".

Matty: not only are comments bound to suffer from a fear of english book learnin', it seems the blog content suffers a tad. To whit:

"We asked you is Syria and Iran are trying to interfere with the spread of democracy by promoting terrorism. Find out how your fellow OneNewsNow.com readers responded."

Huh?

Diane Griffin said...

Ooo, syntax!

Lulu Maude said...

These sterling souls make Dan Quayle irrelevant.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I know one of us(and it wasn't me but I kind of wish it was!) wrote that "comment".

I am going to spend the next hour "commenting" away- sans commas, sans apostrophes, sans everything!!

Whoo hoo. George Bush are the greatest God feerin president ever and Jimmy Carter (showing my elitist roots here by copying something I read on wonkette) aint nuthin but a puzzlewit fathead.

Oh wait. No one in that crowd would ever use puzzlewit... Wait, no one since Teddy Roosevelt has used it, has they?

Anonymous said...

ZIPDRIVE SEZ
PUZZLEWIT AINT NO WORD AND ID WRITE MORE EXCEPTIN NASCAR IS ON THE TV.

Anonymous said...

OMG I loves me some syntax!

dguzman said...

and I'll follow up with my comments:

besides them messkins ain't even fit to look at our flag much less pick our taters and such. oh shee-it is the nascar race on maw?

liquiddaddy said...

Mom? Is that you?

LD

HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...

That's from page 9 of Idiot MadLibs:

If [Democrat's Name] had been in office when [Major National Event] happened, we would be {Undesirable and Unrealistic Outcome]!!!!

Praise Jesus that we America had [Republican President] in office.

Now it's time to turn on [Fox News Show] and [Verb] my [Body Part].

Anonymous said...

I was just looking for a train schedule here in NYC and went to the wrong(hah- no coincidences and all that) website.

It is definitely for the nutty christian thread. As someone who does follow the manz(Jesus that is)(albeit irreverently which is how I think he likes it) I was howling with glee.

I do believe after taking their little quiz(ok i didn't finish but I think I know)... I believe I am going straight off to H- E - double hockey sticks pronto.

I will send all PonyPals a postcard from down there. I bet the company is fabulouso! Perhaps I will see you guys there soon!

www.mtainfo.com

Anonymous said...

"ALL THE DEMOCRATS WANT TO DO IS BOW DOWN TO
ANYONE THAT HAS A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION WITH
THEM. THEY DON'T HAVE ENOUGH BACKBONE TO STAND
UP AND FIGHT BACK. "

Wait a minute - this christian has a point.