Friday, December 08, 2006

Please Be Concerned about Concerned Women of America's Infected Toy Concerns

Ah yes, those hidden little nuggets of cultural disease lurking innocently just beneath the skins of the most inane-looking playthings. Please head the warnings of the always bubbly and vivacious (as long as nothing gets out of line) Beverly LaHaye Institute (via Agape Press, obvs) and make sure little Amber and Jason don't fall prey to clever little pro-fudgepacking and otherwise Satanic messages concealed within their Legos and My Little Pony (Gulp!) play sets.

Here are some toys to avoid:
  • Partial-Birth-Abort-Me Elmo
  • Tom of Finland GI Joe play set
  • Trannsformer Robots
  • My Pet Sacrificial Goat
  • Junior Stem-Cell chemistry kit
  • STD trading cards
  • Babel Japanese schoolgirl action figure with skirt-lifting action
  • "Tiffany Cheney Has Two Mommies" book and CD set
And, of course, when purchasing DVDs for your children, make sure you're buying the real thing and not the porno version (see above).


Jess Wundrun said...

"Choose toys and games that are interactive and encourage creativity,"

Does the Santorum's dead baby count? Or the fetus in a jar?


Lulu Maude said...

Uh-Oh... I see new search primacy in things butt-ful.

HRH King Friday XIII said...

You forgot Bi-Curious George.

Anonymous said...

For all the goods on LaHaye, check out this book

guru-On-A-Soap-Box said...

I've always found that anatomy puzzles are good for kids of all ages and the parents can't really complain because, heck, they are all about the human body which is a beautiful thing created by God some 7000 (? not up on Creationism) years ago.

And since Woman/Eve was made from Adam's rib, when Adam is angry at Eve he can break her ribs to put her in her place.


And that's why some religions don't eat pork ribs, right? Because they are not into cannibalism. Catholics eat pork ribs and they also eat the body of Christ. But that's not cannibalism because it's a wafer.

I'm going to stop now. Feel free to delete me.