Wednesday, June 21, 2006

More Proof that Yes, I Would Devote a Blog to Ursula Plassnik if I were Austrian

U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (L) listens to Austrian Foreign Minister and President of the EU Council Ursula Plassnik (R) after signing an agreement for the Renewal of the Cooperation Programme in the field of High School and Professional Education during the annual U.S. - European Union summit in Vienna June 21, 2006. REUTERS/Leonhard Foeger (AUSTRIA)
OMG, LOVE HER! Condi got to meet up with her regal Amazonian/Austrian counterpart once again, and as before Ms. Plassnik shows her peculiar tendency to drape large colorful objects around her trunk-like neck. Truly this gigantic shemale was created to be a queen, and had she been born centuries earlier, her enemies would have fled wild-eyed in terror and those who lived would have told the hideous tales of the enormous snow-beast who had terrorized them. Here's some more pictures, just because Ursula RULES:



Below, please enjoy the affable giantess's doomed attempt to appear normal-sized to fit into the photo with her tiny colleagues:


22 comments:

Sommer said...

Oh my god I love that the photographer went with the full shot on that. She looks like she's about to bust out with the hokey pokey.

Anonymous said...

I love her! I think the colorful scarf is to say, "Hello, I'm up here, mortals! Yoo-hoo!" I would totally read your blog about her, even though I'm not Austrian. BTW Princess there was a good story about Condi and Bolton in the Minn-St Paul Star Tribune today.

Anonymous said...

Yes, no doubt Ursula is further proof that the dissolution of the Austro-Hungarian Empire was a major historical mistake (we have to thank, in part, Mr. Wilson for that). Just think if Ursula were Emperor/ress of the former Hapsburg lands ... What better way to make Europe "one and whole" -- and attractive --again (well, at least Central Europe).

Isn't the word, dear Pony, "tendency?"

Anonymous said...

I love Ursula! There should be a blog for her...genius!

That last photo is pure genius!

Sue said...

Fashion speaks.

Anonymous said...

Herr Frau Dokter Uber Alles! You can totally spot the Next Big Thing, Princess Sparkle Pony!

Lulu Maude said...

Dubya looks uptight about being dwarfed.

Unknown said...

Hot damn..she is a tad tall isn't she? I think she should stand up too and make the little people suck it up and deal.

Anonymous said...

Ok, first picture: Condi has clearly received an Ursula-sized book from the Giantess's library. The look on the Austrian's face says, "You know I wrote that one myself. Great tips inside on how to remove that unwanted facial hair..." Condi's mental reply, as evidenced by her facial expression: "If my arm veins were bulging anymore under the weight of this cinderblock, I'd probably be losing consciousness right now and this nightmare might come to a close..."

Photo 2: the collective lack of enthusiasm here is electric. The only one who seems transfixed is the woman with the brooch and red ribbon...but that could be the effect of her plastic surgeon's wizardry with scalpel and syringe. Condi: "Child, the last time I was this bored was the State of the Union...at least then I could laugh to myself when Dub-yah flubbed up." Ursula Man-in-a-dress: "I haven't eaten anything in minutes...There have to be some villagers around here somewhere." Blue Shirt Dude: "If I hold my hands apart far enough, no one will know I am praying for death as a release from this interminable horror."

Photo 3: While shaking hands with the Bobsey Twins (with ties to match the wallpaper and upholstery - someone gay was in on that one), Ursula stoops her posture, like Lily Tomlin's Edith Anne might, had she ever descended from the rocking chair, awkwardly and unsure of herself. Next frame: leaning in toward our Ineptitude-in-chief, she whispers: "Is this how the American surfers are standing when they mount the waves on their planks?"

erat said...

Did I miss something? Why is Ursula standing with her feet pointed inwards?

She's quite a looker... Yeah.

z7q2 said...

More Nobel Peace Prize material, Princess! You are a petroleum by-product Goddess amongst mere mortal "professional" bloggers, and this post proves it.

Peteykins said...

OK, now you're being WAY too nice, z7, although I do appreciate your reminder that I'm not a professional blogger.

OMG, they should put ads in teen magazines saying "Be a blogger... or look just like one!"

samael7 said...

I heart green bamboo-patterned scarf-thingies. Although given her height, she should be careful not to be mistaken for lunch by any passing pandas.

And Dubya is grimacing in that last pic not because he's being dwarfed, but because her grip has pulped his phalanges and cut off circulation.

"Must . . . be . . . macho . . . won't . . . cry . . . in agony . . . Mommy!"

Anonymous said...

Dear Condi (I know this is your absolutely favourite breakfast read), pay no attention to all this rush of comments on rival Teutonic Lumpenfrau. No class at all.
Some of us, at least, are more interested in the strange black thing with protruding eyes that appears to be sitting on your knee in picture 2.

Anonymous said...

Can we swap foreign ministers for a bit? Ursula is just a feast for the eyes and I'm sure Condi would turn those napping Austrians with their beer on lunch break around.

Anonymous said...

Schwimmware Alert!

Catch Urlsula poolside on these three pages of 'urlaub' at the hidden valley ranch of the amazons in b. f. egypt.

http://www.egy.com/social/01-01-01.1.html

PS I'd watch her take down Schwarzenegger on pay per view wrestling -- and take her victory prize Maria Schriver back to the secret jungle laboratory.

Peteykins said...

OMG, Ursula in a bikini! That is really awesome.

Anonymous said...

MAJOR improvement over JoAnn Emerson. Great job, PSP!

Peteykins said...

Wikipedia says she's 6'3", but I seriously think she's more like 6'5". I'll try to pull together a superfab Ursula tribute this weekend!

Clearly a new Pink Pony Starlette is born!

Anonymous said...

Pic #1 reminds me of Inga Swenson and Robert Guillaume.

Unknown said...

Oh hell yeah..you could do a whole week on her like that other bitch..er..congresswoman..wtf was her name?

Karen Zipdrive said...

Mmmm, I'd totally like to climb that Mountain. She makes me want to yodel.