Monday, June 19, 2006

Busy as a Beaver -- A Beaver in Prada Slingbacks

Kosovo President Fatmir Sejdiu, left, and the Kosovo Prime Minister Agim Ceku, right, meets with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice , center, Monday, June 19, 2006, at the State Department in Washington. AP Photo/Haraz N. Ghanbari)
OMG, were you having Condi withdrawls? I sure was, but today was a bustling Condiday bursting with activity and superimportant meetings and pressers and, oh, just oodles and oodles of cuddles 'n' frisky shenanigans for everyone! And she wore a shiny, pretty purple suit! But right off the bat we've got a problem, seen above, because La Rice isn't accustomed to meeting with two heads-o-state at once so there goes the classic matching armchairs set-up out the window. Look, you can see it peeking out coyly from behind them! I mean, what was the State Department going to do? Put the guys in the chairs and plop Condi on the flower arrangement? Only in our dirtiest, most glitter-addled dreams, my dear Pony Pals™. I would also like to know why Kosovo needs both a President and a Prime Minister. Like, WTF? Hungry for titles much? Plus OMG they're totally dressed twinsy-style.

So anyway, then it was time for an exciting dueling-podiums double-header. First up, some guy from Spain:

U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (R) and Spain's Foreign Minister Miguel Angel listen to a question during a joint news conference at the State Department in Washington June 19, 2006. REUTERS/Yuri Gripas
And, hooray! Yuri Gripas! He always catches Condi and her pals at their warmest. Errr, but that guy doesn't look like very much fun, does he? I don't think he likes Condi very much, do you? Oh well, it doesn't matter because next, YAY, we have a girl playmate for Condi:

U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (R) speaks as Poland's Foreign Minister Anna Fotyga listens during their joint news conference at the Benjamin Franklin room of the State Department in Washington June 19, 2006. REUTERS/Yuri Gripas (UNITED STATES)
I think she looks pretty nice, I guess, but can you say dueling helmets? Can we talk about Condi's hair for a second? I mean, that's just kinda congealing on her head; hardening, like she's growing a carapace or something. OMG, ew, I'm totally freaking myself out.

But Dr. Secretary's day didn't start off on such a fun skip-around-and-say-hi foot because she had to say goodbye to one of her pals, unwanted moderate Deputy Robert Zoellick:

Deputy Secretary of State Robert Zoellick (R) announcing his resignation during a news conference with US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice (L) at the US State Department in Washington, DC.(AFP/Karen Bleier)
Our gal knows how to drop-kick a guy out of the room with style, doesn't she? Good riddance! Sure there's always room for combovers in the State Department, but more to the right, please.

And on a final note, imagine what it means when a man like Robert Zoellick is called a moderate.


dusty said...

I was thinking the same thing..Zoellick a mod?

Yay! more Yuri!

Tiny Banquet Committee said...

What a fastidious-looking man. The combination of blow-dried comb-over and the way his glasses are perched on the tip of his nose makes me wonder if Princess Condicise is going to be a raggedy mess without him. Also, I was reading too fast and thought you said CORNROWS rather than "combovers" - whoa, there, pony!

Adam said...

Hey Princess - it's Jonathan's friend Adam. We met a few weeks ago at work, outside by a fountain. You liked my shoes. Anyway, I just found and bookmarked your delightful blog and have been checking recently for the fun and games...

Kosovo with a PM and a Pres - Italy's the same way, though they don't let the Pres do any of the talking outside of the state. Bleah.

La Rice and the Spanish guy - what is he, angling for a spot in Gryffindor with that tie? Sorting Hat, take note!

La Rice and the Polish lady - Condi's gesture accompanies comments unrecorded: "You know, I was watching this show called Jackass once...I think we should get on bikes and ride toward one another with lances. I mean, we've already got the helmets..."

Condi and Combover - her expression says: "Did I check the expiration date on the half and half in Dubyah's personal Oval Office fridge? He'll be mightily pissed if it's turned, and then Karl Rove will never get him down for his nap...Wait, what am I listening to again?"

sleepyinsaudi said...

Can you see in the picture of Condogirl and Polishlady, Condogirl is starting to grow a unicorn horn out of her forehead? Yayyyyyy!

sleepyinsaudi said...

Oh and I almost forgot, Condi, you're not going to win the Pretty Pretty Princess posture "P" award if you slouch like that. Sholders back! Stand up straight!

Those two guys look like Dr. Evil and Mini Me.

sleepyinsaudi said...

I meant the above comment to be about the first picture of HRH and "those two guys". I need some coffee.

Anonymous said...

Pony, you great contributor to the national debate:

You know, Zoellick and Condi look as if they were separated at birth, if you look beyond the fact that he's got a mustache. I would be interesting to do a Zoellick/Condi face-to-face comparison, or a Z/C photomontage. Just a thought.

samael7 said...

Not merely a return to Condi, but more YuriVision(TM). He really is a good photographer, no joke.

And I'll bet my biggest, pinkest, sparkliest ribbon that Zoellick was responsible for one or two of the failed armchair-and-flower-arrangement kerfluffles we've seen documented. Poor man. Poor fussy, fussy looking man.

Anonymous said...

Have you noticed the plaster on the Princess' finger? Wonder what she did???

Karen Zipdrive said...

Oh boy, I can't wait to read Zoellick's tell-all biography.
Another domino falls.