Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Anglo-Saxon Attitudes



People enjoy Glenn Beck! Lots of 'em! I can only watch about 30 seconds before his twitching and exaggerated facial and vocal modulations get the better of me and make me run away.

I think Lewis Carroll, in Through the Looking-Glass, describes him the best:

I see somebody now!' she exclaimed at last. 'But he's coming very slowly—and what curious attitudes he goes into!' (For the messenger kept skipping up and down, and wriggling like an eel, as he came along, with his great hands spread out like fans on each side.)

'Not at all,' said the King. 'He's an Anglo-Saxon Messenger—and those are Anglo-Saxon attitudes. He only does them when he's happy. His name is Haigha.' (He pronounced it so as to rhyme with 'mayor.')

'I love my love with an H,' Alice couldn't help beginning, 'because he is Happy. I hate him with an H, because he is Hideous. I fed him with—with—with Ham-sandwiches and Hay. His name is Haigha, and he lives—'

'He lives on the Hill,' the King remarked simply, without the least idea that he was joining in the game, while Alice was still hesitating for the name of a town beginning with H. 'The other Messenger's called Hatta. I must have TWO, you know—to come and go. One to come, and one to go.'

'I beg your pardon?' said Alice.

'It isn't respectable to beg,' said the King.

'I only meant that I didn't understand,' said Alice. 'Why one to come and one to go?'

'Didn't I tell you?' the King repeated impatiently. 'I must have Two—to fetch and carry. One to fetch, and one to carry.'

At this moment the Messenger arrived: he was far too much out of breath to say a word, and could only wave his hands about, and make the most fearful faces at the poor King.

'This young lady loves you with an H,' the King said, introducing Alice in the hope of turning off the Messenger's attention from himself—but it was no use—the Anglo-Saxon attitudes only got more extraordinary every moment, while the great eyes rolled wildly from side to side.

'You alarm me!' said the King. 'I feel faint—Give me a ham sandwich!'

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

he is a ham sandwich w/ a side of
douche.

desertwind said...

Hammy ham-handed ham-fisted swine.

Beck will be burbling "hama-hama-hama-hama-hama" when they come to take him away.

in an Anglo-Saxon attitude sort of way, of course.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Beck reminds me of a villain from the Archie comics.

Karen Zipdrive said...

P.S. Don't you just know he was THAT guy in gym class who would snap naked guys' butts with a wet towel in the gym?
And I'll bet he smells like Old Spice, beer and smegma.

Lulu Maude said...

Brilliant, Pony. And lots of fun.

dguzman said...

Wonderful! And the collage up top is A-1.

karen marie said...

glen beck is NOT anglo-saxon!

look at that pudgy head -- no angles and definitely no sax.