Friday, May 14, 2010

Richard Cohen WTF Watch


The Washington Post's site was down this morning, so I didn't catch this bizarre Richard Cohen post earlier. But please, I dare you to make sense of this weird, hacky mess. A sample:

I could say she is not a mom -- the current cutesy term for “mother” -- but fathers know the same fear and may, based on a recollection of their own wayward youth, feel it more keenly. Whatever the case, becoming a parent is admission to a huge club in which the members, no matter what their status in the rest of their lives, experienced an instant loss of control. Parents are humble people.

Becoming a parent is in some ways like becoming a peasant. Peasants are more than poor. Traditionally, they live at the whim of other forces -- their masters, the weather, crop failures, locusts, disease and just about anything else you can name. They have little control of their lives.

Wait... what? Can you imagine making a living writing that badly?

Good work if you can get it.

7 comments:

Smapdi said...

'Mom' was the cutesy contraction for momma coined in 1894.

It is as if he hes never walked through a shopping mall on a Saturday afternoon, oh wait..

He seems to mean that parents are vulnerable, not humble. He says nothing to support his thesis of humility. And unlike serfs, some people can choose to become parents - people rarely choose to be surfs.

I blame Regan for closing the public mental institutions.

Matty Boy said...

We do not fear locusts.

I couldn't say it better myself, probably because I would never say such a thing.

desertwind said...

Lock the liquor cabinet, George!

RC's comin' up the walk.

babzter said...

RC has a bright career as Thomas Friedman in his future.

Toriko said...

Upon joining the 'mom' club myself I have noticed that many parents have a new outlook on a life that no longer centers on them and their individual needs. This outlook can be summarized best by quoting any number of the vapid characters on the reality TV show 'The Hills' when they whine, "Its haaaaaarrrrrrd."

It isn't hard. It can be tedious and frustrating, but it isn't difficult to be a parent. Billions of others are doing it right now.

Karen Zipdrive said...

...what Smapdi said about the term Mom.

samael7 said...

Thank you, Smapdi, for looking that up.

I couldn't make it through that first sentence, let alone the rest of that word salad. Because I couldn't get past:

1) He honestly thinks the "mom" thing is true, or
2) He thinks it might actually be nearly true, but won't set off anyone's bullshit alarms, or
3) He knows it's total bullshit so bullshitty it's very existence is evidence of bullshit-protomatter, but does it anyway to deliberately give himself an "old, out-of-touch-guy" schtick, which he's perfectly capable of flying up the flagpole on a daily basis without resorting to this cosmic-level BS, which IN TURN makes me wonder if he didn't suddenly wake up that day thinking, "Wow, I don't think I've been playing up the old-guy schtick that much lately. I need to buff my old-guy street cred," except not in those words because he probably never actually heard the phrase "street cred" used in that way before, because he really is, mentally, an old guy, no additional dissembly required...

...at which point I stopped, stepped back, and admired the sheer, breathless performace art of it all.