Thursday, January 28, 2010

Book Shelf: Dukes Of Hazzard Coloring & Activity Book

This clumsily illustrated and cheaply produced Dukes of Hazzard tie-in was published in 1981 by the unlikely sounding "Modern Promotions, a division of Unisystems, Inc.," in fact a prolific producer of this kind of thing. This stuff is a poignant reminder of pre-Photoshop days, before untalented hacks gained the means to produce slick-looking pages. Here's the front cover and title page:

Click any for bigger and play along at home!

We're dropped in medias res as a retarded deputy discovers oil on the ground shortly after driving his car into a tree:


Connect the dots, la la la la! The plot thickens as the imbecilic law enforcers plot to steal the oil:


Play where's the oil in this challenging maze. Next, the young studs and their daddy bear discover the sheriff's none-too subtle plan:


The lithe boys jump into their horrible car to investigate:


The chase is on:


I had to look up Dukes of Hazzard to get the answer to four across because how the hell would I know who the brother of Luke Duke is:


The mad dash to the surveyor's office continues. Note, too an amusing misspelling:


At this point it becomes clear that the story makes no sense at all:


The tale concludes (?) in part two, tomorrowSaturday.

5 comments:

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Truly dreadful.

HRH King Friday XIII, Ret. said...

Well, at least one can spend time coloring Bo Duke's sexy, bulging man-crotch.

Shara Azod said...

Bad azz- love it.

Karen Zipdrive said...

I cannot believe you didn't color in it.

samael7 said...

Ugh, my sister loved this show. I did not, but was forced to endure it on occasion. There wasn't ever actually a plot: just a protracted excuse to have the car jump over something, with the usual corollary that a police car . . . would fail to. I'm pleased to see the coloring book is in keeping with this tradition.

Sorrell Boke was wasted on this show.