Monday, November 10, 2008

Idiots Complain About Imbeciles

When a two-thousand-year-old Middle Eastern resurrection cult butts heads with a 19th century revision of a two-thousand-year-old Middle Eastern resurrection cult, something's got to give:

NEW YORK (AP) -- Holocaust survivors said Monday they are through trying to negotiate with the Mormon church over posthumous baptisms of Jews killed in Nazi concentration camps, saying the church has repeatedly violated a 13-year-old agreement barring the practice.

Leaders of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints say they are making changes to their massive genealogical database that will make it more difficult for names of Holocaust victims to be entered for posthumous baptism by proxy, a rite that has been a common Mormon practice for more than a century.

Read the whole article and be amazed that people are actually fighting about this mythological nonsense. People are very upset! People are very stupid! And, no, before you say anything, I really don't have to respect anything about either side of this dizzyingly stupid conflict. It's 2008! OMG, they made Aunt Esther a Mormon! And she hated Utah!


Matty Boy said...

Mmm, princess... the Jews aren't a 2,000 year old resurrection cult. A little older than that, not so big on the resurrection.

Is the picture yours? Whoever did it, I love it.

JollyRoger said...

The Jesusistanis are good for a lot of laughs, when they aren't brawling at Jesus's tomb, at least. The LDS are perhaps the funniest ones of all, although the holy rollers certainly vie for the "tops in comedy" spot.

FranIAm said...

Photoshoppery deluxe.

Oh - it sucks ass to be a religious person I tell you, but I am Fran and FranIam is well... Now that you actually know me, I think you know what I am trying to say.

How I hang my head in shame when wingnuts sing.

The Mormons have been baptizing dead Jews for a long time and they agree to stop and then they start again. It is very effed up.

missannethrope said...

My imaginary savior is going to save your dead relatives' imaginary souls from imaginary limbo whether they like it or not!

Frank said...

Why would Jews care, though? I mean, they don't recognize baptisms, and everyone except Mormons thinks baptizing dead people is crazy-ass, so why fight? I mean, I can understand being put out, because, you know, they DIED BECAUSE THEY WERE JEWS, but I don't know if I'd go all the way to making a big deal about it. I'd just cut them off of my Hanukkah card list and make sure they know they're not welcome to retire in Boca.

*shrug* What do I know, though, I'm just a goyim.

rdale said...

There was a big article in today's Salt Lake Tribune about this:

"Holocaust victim baptisms: Jewish group breaks off contact with LDS Church
Ernest Michel says 14 years of 'pleasant meetings' haven't changed faith's policy
By Jessica Ravitz
The Salt Lake Tribune
Article Launched: 11/11/2008 12:00:00 AM MST

Ernest "Ernie" Michel has had it. For 14 years, the now 85-year-old Holocaust survivor has been leading a quiet and cordial charge to ensure that victims of Nazi terror aren't posthumously baptized by members of the LDS Church."

As another commenter noted, this has been going on for years; the Mormons baptize the Jews (and everyone else; that's why they keep that world-class geneaology library going downtown SLC), then the Jews object, the Mo's promise to stop, some zealots start again, and on and on. They even baptized Hitler! Imagine how that sounds to the Jewish survivors. It's what little old retired Mormons do, they get lists of names and go down'ta the local Temple and put on their totally white "Jesus Jammies," as they're called in Utah, and get baptized over and over and over, until they are even more wrinkly.

samael7 said...

Mormons are currently on my "Poo-poo" list right now, given the vast amounts of money they gave to Yes on 8, so I'm therefore at once looking for some vindictive schadenfreude and wary/weary of outright persecution at the same time.

Yes, they are no weirder than any ressurection cult derivative, frankly, despite said older cults' protests to the contrary. They're like the wild child younger sibling, good at playing the fool to show up the stodgy older relations for what they are.

And, yes, that includes the pre-ressurection Abrahamic circumscision cult they're intent on saving, though I count myself as a nominal member.

It's sort of just . . . rude to engage in the post-mortem necromancy that they do, but it practically makes no difference and only highlights Mormon disdain and their embrace of the lack of free will and conscious choice most rational people respect.

I can't really say more without getting unnecessarily mean, so I'll just comment that if you put a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup in front of practically anything, I will worship it.

KELSO'S NUTS said...

FRANK: Yo si soy judio super-jodido por esta vaina. Me pongo un maldito loco de ver las locuras de los gringos cristianos que perfencen a los Evangelicos Extremos y tal.

I have absolutely no problem with FranIAm's religious views whatsoever. They don't bother me. They make me happy because I like the New Testament. I like Jesuit scholarship. I like the Second Council. I like Cardinal Martini. That's a whole other story.

But other than the meshumedim like Lieberman and Wolfowitz and the rest of the neo-cons, the ways of the world's Diasporal Jews and most Israelis place us in a defensive position against shit like this. I thought I saw Obama get an 80-20 Jewish split in this election. That's no coincidence.

What do you think Palin was talking about when she said "real Americans." Blacks, sure. Jews, sure. Latinos, sure. The LGBTQ community, sure. Free thinkers of any self-identity, really.

But the gall of people who hate me for WHAT I am appropriating MY cultural heroes because they have none of their own.

Fuck 'em sideways. They've kind of stopped their efforts at evangelizing in South America. They have to deal with Catolicos Judios, Muslamanes, Hindus, Buddhistas and ateos that don't receive these fuckers with the same warmth that starving Africans do because South America is rich now and has real democracy and doesn't need their shit.

BTW, "goyim" is plural; "goy" is singular, but to be more specific, you are a "shaygitzeh," a male Gentile.