Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Best Condisite Ever

I almost hate to tell you this, but this is not the only web site dedicated to Condi! It's true! None of them cover the important things (clothes, hairdos, inspiring new Hebrew put-downs) like I do, but they all maybe love her just a little more. And, gosh, they all sure do wish she'd run for president!

But anyway, I think I finally found my absolute favorite: and its accompanying Condiblog (it's really called that!), because absolutely everything about it is, like, totally oppositeville from here. It's so fun to read! And confusing! Is Condi a "Black Swan"?, they wonder, and I read their answer and I still don't know what the hell they're talking about! Sometimes they sound almost like PSP, like when they breathlessly exclaimed that the Annapolis thingy was "a success before it even starts" and then suggested playing Leslie Gore during the proceedings.

I think the following quote, from their hilarious post on The Art of Negotiation, best demonstrates the Bizarro World PSP qualities of this most excellent Condifan. It features so many of the same concerns as this blog: photo-ops, people saying mean things about Condi, the fact that she never really accomplishes anything, etc., but with a wacky down-is-up, bad-is-good spin:

Also, diplomacy is as important for what it does not accomplish — although it doesn’t make for great headlines or photo-ops. When a diplomatic solution is not reached, this is often a necessary first-step in enlisting the help of allies and neutralizing potential adversaries in non-diplomatic solutions. Remember England’s help in Iraq, for example?

Our Secretary of State deserves our support as she pursues the peaceful resolution of conflict around the globe. And keep in mind that “successful” negotiations frequently are successful for when they do not reach an agreement. The appearance of critics from within her own party and among our allies only weakens her negotiating position as she tries to do her job.

It's so fantastic to see Condi's legacy in such capable hands!


Brooklyn Red said...

I'm speechless - what can you say about a web site, honoring Condi, that begins with a quote from Yogi Berra??? Perhaps, "If you don't set goals, you can't regret not reaching them" or maybe, "We're lost, but we're making great time"

FranIAm said...

Condi-licous! Rice-tastic!

I am weak in the knees from reading this stuff. It is like Prince Dulldonkey or whatever the opposite of you would be.

This was one of my fave lines-
It saddens many of us to see attacks on Secretary of State Rice’s Middle East peace efforts. That is her job — in case anyone has forgotten. By definition, the SoS is supposed to provide diplomatic options to the Chief Executive and then facilitate, foster, even nurture the domestic and foreign support that is typically essential to the success of foreign policy.

Wow. Cool.

(Fran sauters off singing softly to herself "R-E-S-P-E-C-T..." (just a little bit.)

John said...

I love their use of "quotation marks!"

Toriko said...

I did a google search for England in Iraq, hoping to link to a site detailing their failed efforts there around 1914 which bares striking parallels to failed American efforts there now. The problem is when you google England and Iraq together you get a depressing amount of hits for Private Lynndie England so I gave up. The people at must be right. England has totally helped Iraq.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Are they fucking kidding me?
It's not funny enough to be funny and too flimsy to be seriously frivolous in the style of most GOP fawners.

Ow, damn, now I have a headache.
Please do not confuse me.

Distributorcap said...

like jello -- there is always room for more Condi

Distributorcap said...

and even better == you CAN shop for CondiApparel

Princess Sparkle Pony said...

See what I mean, Karen? Is it not the greatest?

HRH King Friday XIII said...

It's Condirific! Contastic! Condi-fucking-ay!

dguzman said...

So Dr. Shoes's job is ("in case anyone has forgotten"--!)to "facilitate, foster, even nurture" something? Uh--I don't think Condi has the tools to facilitate, foster, or nuture a ChiaPet, much less "the domestic and foreign support that is typically essential to the success of foreign policy." Holy Peter Principle, Batman--talk about being promoted beyond one's level of competency.

Karenzipdrive said...

Yes, I do see what you mean.
It's like going to a Japanese restaurant and all they bring to your table is that rubber replica food.

Sister Nancy Beth Eczema said...

I was struck by this post title: "Condi does her homework for Middle East peace." How do we know she didn't copy somebody else's?