Friday, January 26, 2007

Jacques Chirac Just Isn't Into Older Chicks, OK?

OK, so we saw this yesterday:



And this:



Well, it turns out that Chirac was placing his mouth on almost all the Diplomatrixes, just running around right and left, forcing his lips on each and every lady's quivering and no-doubt appreciative hands. Here's a delightful account of all the hot French action, with one jealous Diplomatrix hilariously left out, from the Mirror:
BET you've never seen French charm vanish so quickly...

President Jacques Chirac plants lingering kisses on the hands of women dignitaries from around the world - then resorts to a firm handshake for Margaret Beckett.

The 74-year-old smoothie warmly welcomes Austrian foreign minister Ursula Plassnik, Greek counterpart Dora Bakoyannis and Canada's Josee Verner at a Lebanon conference in Paris.

He even gave US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice the full Chirac treatment, despite his fierce opposition to the Iraq war.

But the idea of getting personal with our own Foreign Secretary seemed to turn him cold.

Really, what have the others got that Margaret hasn't?
And sure enough, here Chirac is bestowing his hot lips on Dora Bakoyannis:



And not only kissing, but seemingly trying to inhale hot (yet Canadian) Josee (OMG, Josee!!!!) Verner's fingers:



But Mags? Put 'er there, fella:



What do the others have that Mags lacks? Oh, England, don't make me say it.

24 comments:

sfmike said...

How rude of Chirac. He should have just shut his eyes, puckered up on those knuckles, and thought of England.

Matty Boy said...

Jacques is the sort of guy who puts a woman on a pedestal... so he can look up her skirt.

Anonymous said...

I think Mags was expecting a nice kiss on the old knuckles, look at how her hand is positioned in his...I think she was mightily disappointed not to get a kiss or two.

Then again he is a frog and us Brits can't be messing around with that lot! ;-)

Miss Kitten said...

Exchanging Nip Tuck contacts, there is NO time to waste on bowing and scraping.

P.S. Why are they always called Margaret?

Princess Sparkle Pony said...

Special message to the person whose posts I keep deleting: your comments aren't really comments on my posts at all. Basically, you seem to be writing your own blog and posting it in the comment sections here.

Get your own blog.

Lulu Maude said...

Tacky! I hope old Margaret farted, just as she turned away from him.

Anonymous said...

After the Canadian diplobabe he's probably just worn out.


pwapvt

Anonymous said...

and a ps,

her constituency is Quebec City. Very Nice!

pwapvt

Anonymous said...

maybe you should add her to your diploharem. She'd fit right in under Ursula's arm pit.


pwapvt

Duros62 said...

Dude, Dora's hot!!!1!

Matty Boy said...

Josee's a pussycat... no doubt about it. And Dora's got a Katherine-Harris-minus-the-crazy look that I could get used to. But both of them are lugging bags on stage. It's too girly. Diplogals™ on the go like Condi and Ursula know that the proper accessory to carry the feminine neccessities is the underling.

As for Mags and bags on stage... as we say in mathematics, the joke will be left as an exercise for the reader.

Anonymous said...

Josee' - smokin' hottee'

guru-On-A-Soap-Box said...

Chirac and Margaret....LIZARDS....not that I mean any offense to lizards, but didja EVER see the like?

Or turkeys?

I've misplaced the pet flies again. Drat and dadblast it!

Lulu Maude said...

Actually, the more I see Chirac hand-humping those sweet younger things, the better off I think ol Margaret is.

Alicia said...

He looks like he's asking her for directions to the mens' room.

samael7 said...

Every time I see Ms. Beckett, I keep envisioning her saying, "It's the wrong trousers, Gromitt!!"

keithsparkle said...

I heart Dora, but she should look to her big diplosister Ursula for guidance. That big bag is a bad freshman move. I would hope that all these Diplomatrons have assistants more competent than Anna Wintour’s. If they are worth their weight in blackberries then let the assistants drag the purses around. This leads to a big question. Is a purse too effeminate for a senior official? Could Condi be as effective with a Burkin Bag? Is our society ready glamour power?

Princess Sparkle Pony said...

Now that I think about it, Condi generally doesn't carry a purse, but when she does, it's usually a small clutch. I did feature some photos a while back of Condi at a formal evening event, and she held, horrifyingly enough, a piano-themed Judith Leiber purse.

gjdodger said...

Dora, incidently, is six feet even, and could handle power forward to Ursula's pivot. Take it to the low post!

Matty Boy said...

Dora is six feet tall?!? She looks taller than Condi, but not as tall as UberUrsula (or is it Ursula Major?), but I thought it might just be a camera angle thing.

Wow. I bet she has the cutest accent, too. This is a problem; I can only handle one fantasy dream date at a time, and the information is flying at me too fast. YOW!

gjdodger said...

Ursula is six-three, Bubba. She could administer a facial to Gabrielle Reece. Or, I dare say, to you.

Blue Gal said...

If I read this blog enough, I will never have to do another crunch again. My aching sides. That is all.

Matty Boy said...

Dear dodger, if you have read my previous posts, it will be clear that I am not challenging Ursula with a "Hey, toots! You wanna piece of me? It's go time!!!" sort of attitude. I have offered my abject (and yes, tingly) surrender to her and the new EuroAmazon overlady regime long ago.

I was just surprised to hear about Dora. Obviously, this is a second great success for the EU Minister of Enlargement. While our new DoD chief Gates is small but perfectly formed, well suited to lead our quick but downsized army, the Europeans have developed a method for producing oversized yet perfectly proportional females.

The EU Challenge to our superpower status is only a matter of time. "Hey, Americans! Stop being so warlike or we will send our girlfriends over to beat you up!"

Again, the tingliness.

gjdodger said...

Unfortunately, Joanie Weston and Ann Calvello have passed on, so we cannot summon up the Roller Derby Queens of Yore to scissor kick the European Amazons into oblivion. I guess we're stuck with Madeleine "Thighs of Steel" Albright, and hell, she was born over there. Undoubtedly, something in the water.